MARVELOUS MOVIES: X-MEN (2000)

Posted on June 20, 2012 by Chrissy

I don’t remember why I went to see X-Men when it came out in theaters in 2000. Twelve years ago, I was not a fan of comic books or superheroes. It’s occurred to me that it might have had something to do with Hugh Jackman, but looking at his filmography, I see that this movie must have been my introduction to Hugh Jackman. However, being a big fan of Star Trek: the Next Generation, perhaps I was intrigued to see Patrick Stewart in a role other than Captain Picard. But most probably, one of my kids told me this movie would be good, and wanted me to take them to see it, so I did.

And was pleasantly surprised.

I didn’t know anything about Marvel comics at the time, and if someone had told me this was based on a DC comic, or a novel, or a TV show, or was a completely original script, I wouldn’t have batted an eye. Of course today I know better. But none of this matters. Because whether you know the source material or not, this first X-Men movie stands on its own.

I admit, it works better for me today, knowing more about the Marvel Universe, but back then it still worked, and very well. In fact, it worked so well that this DVD was one of the first I put in my collection, and through the years a good amount of housework has been accomplished with X-Men playing in the background.

Something about the X-Men appeals to me. Is it the idea of being different, an outsider, shunned by society? Is that what touches a nerve with me? As children and teenagers, we tend to see ourselves, at least to some degree, as inferior, and thus, ostracized. There’s certainly a strong theme of persecution and alienation running through the X-Men movies. Anyone who’s ever suffered even the slightest hint of an inferiority complex and/or persecution, either real or imagined, will probably connect on that level, if nothing else.

But of course, the mutants of X-Men, though different, are not inferior to the general population. They’re superior! What kid or teenager wouldn’t like to think they’re actually better than the society that spurns them? And how many adults still have a little bit of that kid or teenager still lurking about in their psyche?

I think that’s what grabs me about these movies.

But let’s not get ahead of ourselves. For right now, I’m not talking about “these movies,” only this one movie. It begins with Jean Grey and Senator Kelly debating whether or not mutants should be “registered” so everyone can know who and where they are, and what they can do. As much as I tend to side with outcasts and underdogs, I hate to say it, but I can totally see the Senator’s point. It’s a little scary to think about all these potentially angry young people walking around with superpowers.

But of course that’s what’s so perfect about Professor X’s School for the Gifted. What a great place of acceptance, growth, and fellowship. The grounds and the rooms are beautiful, calming and comfortable. Who wouldn’t want to be there?

And Professor X is the best. I mean…isn’t he? He’s like the most evolved person on the planet. (It totally makes sense to have Patrick Stewart in the role.)

Enter Wolverine, our bad boy. I could do without the hairstyle, but I guess that’s how he’s portrayed in the comics (I haven’t read up to Wolverine yet). I’m glad they lost the hairstyle early in the movie, but kept the surly attitude. He’s the loner, the mutant who is so far gone, he’s not seeking acceptance, he just wants to be left alone (kind of like Hulk).

Of course, once he falls in with Professor X and his gang of mutants, there’s no way he can remain a loner. Actually, I think that actually happens before he gets to the school, when he meets Rogue. He tries at first to get rid of her, but his conscience won’t let him. They share a bond, become friends. When she runs away and he finds her on the train, he tells her “Don’t worry, I’ll take care of you.” It’s a great moment. The writers really knew what to do with this character, softening him up just a little, but not too much.

I like Jean Grey as the no-nonsense scientist, and I guess I understand why she’s attracted to Logan (but of course won’t admit it). Her boyfriend Scott/Cyclops is the Captain America type, Mr. Whitebread/Dudley Do-Right, and of course she should be happy with him. But for someone as smart as she is, maybe he’s a little too boring–despite the fact that he can blow holes in Grand Central Station with his eyes. I don’t know. A low-key love triangle is set in place, but I’m not really buying it.

Towards the end, Jean Grey tells Logan she thinks Rogue is “a little taken” with him, to which Logan replies, “Tell her my heart belongs to someone else.” When I heard that, I asked…who? Oh! You mean…HER?? Jean Grey. Wait…really? I didn’t see it. It felt forced. The whole love triangle thing just doesn’t work for me. Well…it provides a few amusing moments of tension between Logan and Scott, but beyond that, what’s the point? I mean, is there not enough going on in the movie already, we have to add in this lame love triangle?

Of course there IS enough going on in the movie. We’ve got our villain, Magneto. And in case you were planning to just hate him, the filmmakers won’t let you. The movie starts with Magneto as a boy, in Nazi Germany, being torn from his family. If that scene doesn’t touch you, nothing will. So now we understand WHY Magneto is so angry and evil, but…we kind of don’t blame him.

Can’t we just have our villains straight up? That would be too easy. And really, there’s nothing easy about this movie. The only thing that IS easy is the ability to see both sides of the story.

Senator Kelly is good for that. He starts out as the Number One advocate against mutants, but once Magneto uses his machine to turn Kelly into a mutant himself, of course he becomes more understanding. Then he pays for his sins by exploding into a pool of water, death by extreme mutation.

Or does he? Is he really dead? When Storm said, “I saw Senator Kelly die,” and Magneto replied, “Are you sure you saw what you saw?” Russ paused the movie. It’s the kind of line that can go by quickly on a first hearing, but if you stop to think about it, it really makes you wonder.

What is Magneto saying there? What does he know that nobody else knows? Or does he not know anything? Is he just trying to throw some doubt into the mix, to create confusion when his ally, the blue woman Mystique, will later take on the form of Senator Kelly, now campaigning against mutant registration? In the last scene, we know it’s Mystique, not the Senator, because we see the yellow glint in the eyes. But that doesn’t prove that Senator Kelly is dead. You would think collapsing into a puddle of water would prove he’s dead, but remember…we’re dealing with mutations here. Just because you’ve collapsed into a puddle of water, doesn’t necessarily mean you can’t regroup and reform as…something else.

We won’t see Senator Kelly again in the next two movies. Well, we will see him, but it will be Mysique, not Senator Kelly. So then, can we assume the filmmakers were not setting us up for his return? Or is there yet something else coming down the pike? Remember, if you don’t see a body, they ain’t dead. And in the end, there is no body.

I don’t know if it’s important whether or not he might come back. It’s just an interesting point, brought up by Magneto’s offhand line “Are you sure you saw what you saw?” And it supports my contention that in this world, nothing is black and white, nothing is easy…and nothing is what you think it is.

One of the best moments in the movie, where nothing is what you think it is, comes when Wolverine and Magneto first meet, on the train. Of course everyone has been under the impression that Magneto sent his henchman Sabertooth to attack Wolverine’s truck and capture the regernative man of metal. But why? For what evil purpose? And then on the train we quickly find out that Magneto couldn’t give two hoots about Wolverine. It’s Rogue he’s after! Ka-BOOM! Nice touch, that bit of misdirection.

In the end, Magneto uses Rogue’s ability to channel mutant powers to carry out his evil plan to force mutation on the general public, but the X-Men, in their black leather uniforms (“What would you prefer? Yellow spandex?”) thwart him at the last possible moment. Rogue survives, and gets some cool highlights in her hair. Then, Wolverine, ever the loner, sets out on a “borrowed” motorcycle to seek answers about his mysterious past. Our villain Magneto is contained in a “plastic prison” where he can do no harm, and is visited by his old buddy, who is also his nemesis, Professor Xavier.

Having now seen all the movies, and having read some of the comics, this world is richer for me than it was twelve years ago. Knowing what came before, and what comes next brings a new and exciting dimension to the saga. And it is a saga, a very big story about a particularly fascinating world. The world of the X-Men is gritty and troubled, with no clear-cut answers to the problems that plague their society. Nothing is easy, nothing is black and white, and way too often, nothing is what it seems.

The X-Men may not live in my favorite corner of the Marvel Universe, but it’s still a damned good corner. Whenever heroes work together, good triumphs over evil, and there is a refuge for the lonely, persecuted and misunderstood, as far as I’m concerned, this is a world worth visiting, exploring, and learning more about.

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JOURNEY INTO MYSTERY #84: Love and Commies

Posted on June 14, 2012 by Chrissy

Published: September, 1962

“The Mighty Thor vs. the Executioner”
Script: Stan Lee, Larry Lieber
Pencils: Jack Kirby
Inks: Dick Ayers
Letters: Art Simek

Sometimes Russ is such a GUY.

As I’ve mentioned, I’ve read ahead, and now I am backtracking, attempting to catch up to where I stopped reading, so that I can once again start enjoying “new” stories. With this goal of trying to catch up, Russ is suggesting which stories I should review, and which do not seem particularly “worthy” of review.

He suggested I skip Journey into Mystery #84 and go right to #85. “Why?” I asked.

“Because,” he said, “not much really happens there. The villain is not really that good.”

“What about Jane Foster? Do we meet Jane Foster?”

“Yeah. We meet Jane Foster.”

To which I say…hold on a minute there, buddy! To me, that is a huge event! The introduction of the Dr. Blake/Thor love interest is nearly as significant as the origin story itself. I want to re-acquaint myself with Jane, and her feelings for both Blake and Thor. To me, this crazy “love triangle” is one of the most fascinating aspects of the Marvel Thor mythos!

And so I am taking a moment to comment on this second Thor story, “The Mighty Thor vs the Executioner.”

COMMIES
Well, Russ was certainly right about one thing. As a villain, the Executioner is nothing to get excited about. If we’re just talking villains, we can easily skip over this story. But I do have one general comment.

When Dr. Blake returns from Norway, he volunteers to join a group of doctors traveling to San Diablo, where the ruthless Communist warlord “The Executioner” is at the heart of a revolution. The Executioner attempts several times to stop the goodwill mission of the “Yankee” doctors, and every time Thor appears and thwarts his thwarting.

We are treated to several exciting panels of Thor using his hammer to make mincemeat of Commie tanks, fighter jets and weapons. How satisfying that must have been for the readers of the day! I don’t know if Lee and Kirby were trying to make a political statement, or if they were simply using the issues of the day to fuel their stories in a contemporary fashion. Either way, it makes for an exciting battle, and satisfying conclusion.

Because in the end, the Executioner’s followers realize that it is HE, the Executioner, who has betrayed them and been at the root of all their problems, and that the Americans are their true friends, and so of course the Executioner is executed by his own followers.

The moral of this story is: Commies never win.

Having read ahead a bit, and of course realizing that these tales are set amidst the Cold War, it’s no surprise that Communists frequently appear as villains in the Marvel comics of the times. In this tale, the Executioner looks suspiciously like Fidel Castro. It’s a shame that someone with as cool a name as “The Executioner” appears and is vanquished in less than twelve pages. Despite that, I wouldn’t be at all surprised if Stan raises up another villain named “The Executioner.” In fact, Russ tells me, he does. And apparently I’ve already read about him, but don’t remember him specifically. I think I mentioned before I tend to have a disconnect with the villains? Unless they strike me as fabulously villainous, I don’t easily remember them.

This Executioner is not one that will be easily remembered by anyone but the most ardent Marvel Comic fans. And so we leave him, deserted and dead, at the end of our story.

The Executioner is not our first Commie villain and certainly will not be the last. I suppose all this is fascinating from a historical-socio-political viewpoint, but let’s put all that aside now to get to the really good girly stuff: Jane Foster!

LOVE
Yes! It turns out that Dr. Blake has a crush on his nurse, Jane Foster (“So beautiful…so lovely”). But because he is convinced that she could never reciprocate his feelings, due to the fact that he is “lame,” his love remains unspoken.

Okay, I have to say, I don’t really get where this is coming from. I think Blake is super-sensitive about his “lameness.” So. He walks with a cane. Big deal! He walks. He’s not incapacitated. He’s not a vegetable. He’s a functioning human being. And I think we have to assume that he is, as Data from Star Trek TNG would say, “fully functional.” One lame leg is not going to hamper him in that area, is it? And at least in most of the panels, he’s not a bad-looking guy.

And besides all that, he’s a DOCTOR, from crying out loud! What woman doesn’t want to marry a doctor? (At least that would have been the ultimate goal of so many women in the 1960’s.) What exactly is Blake’s problem? Why can’t he even entertain the possibility that Jane could see him as a romantic prospect? Undoubtedly, he’s more hung up on that one lame leg than she is. Pardon my pun, but I think he’s using his lame leg as a “crutch.”

But what about Jane? Having just met her, I would guess she has a good heart. I mean, why did she go into nursing in the first place? She strikes me as a bit of a romantic, probably lists Florence Nightingale as “the person who most influenced my life,” right after her mother, her father, and Dr. Blake, of course. I mean, why else would she go along with him on this humanitarian mission? She’s interested in helping the poor people of San Diablo, right?

Of course she is. But wait! There’s more! What’s that you say? Jane has another motive for accompanying the good doctor? Yes, indeed! Because…irony of ironies…Jane is just as hung up on Don Blake as he is on her!

But like him, she won’t say anything about it. She’s waiting for him to make the first move. I guess back in the day, good girls didn’t “make the first move.” Well, not unless they wanted to get a “reputation.” And Jane doesn’t want a reputation. But she does want to be with Dr. Blake. And she also wants to help people. So this humanitarian trip is, for her, a “two-fer.”

And she gets a lot more than she bargains for, because she is captured by the Commies. Of course, Blake comes to her rescue, not only as Thor, but also as Blake. In fact, thinking about it now, for two highly educated people, both Blake and Jane are pretty thick-headed in the romance department. They each can’t believe that the other would be interested in them, yet when Jane is captured by the Commies, Blake demands her release, even as a gun is pointed at his back. And then Jane says she will marry the Executioner, if only he will spare Blake’s life. They both seem willing to make tremendous sacrifices for each other’s safety…and yet, when all is said and done, neither one appears to remember any of this.

In addition to this story of tortured silent love, something else also gets set in motion in this first issue featuring Jane Foster. I would have to say this is probably one of the most bizarre Love Triangles of all time, for not only does Blake yearn for Jane as Jane yearns for Blake, but Jane also develops a strong attraction to Thor, never realizing that he and Blake are one and the same.

So here we have a “triangle” that in some strange way, is also a straight line. I’ll let you geometry majors figure that one out!

At this point, Thor has been entirely too busy fighting Commies to even notice the girl with “such lovely eyes…such soft hair,” but if I remember correctly, Thor will eventually be just as taken with Jane as she is with him. So this love triangle will get more convoluted as time goes on.

In this issue, though, I got quite a chuckle over Jane’s first reaction to Thor. She’s just witnessed him take out four fighter jets attacking their ship, and afterwards Thor plunges into the ocean to privately change back to Blake (think Superman’s phone booth here), then is dragged back on board in a life preserver. That’s why he looks somewhat drenched in this next panel. But note what Jane has to say about Thor:

And he was so HANDSOME! Is that all she has to say?? Is that like…the most significant thing she can say about him? Not “Oh thank goodness he was here to save all our lives! If it weren’t for Thor, we’d all be dead now!” No. As Jane is compiling her list of superhero attributes, she blows right past “He’s willing to sacrifice himself for the protection of others” to “Oh! He was so HANDSOME.” And later she notes, “He was so strong, so muscular, so wonderful!”

Okay, wait. Maybe I’m going to rescind on what I said earlier about Blake taking his “lameness” way too seriously. We must assume that he and Jane have worked together for a while, for this bond to have formed between them. He must know her at least a little, and if she is in fact the kind of girl that is so impressed by good looks, muscles and strength, then maybe Blake is right in keeping his love secret. Not only is he “lame,” but he has also been described several times as “skinny.” Apparently, this is the not physical type that would appeal to Jane Foster.

Was Fabio around in 1962? If he was, I’m sure Jane Foster’s nightstand would house a stack of romantic novels with Fabio and some raven-haired beauty on the cover. Blake probably knows this about her, and is therefore (perhaps wisely) keeping his mouth shut about his love for her.

Of course, I once again must use the word “irony.” The irony in this love triangle is simply delicious! In the last panel, Blake tells Jane that during the fighting and shooting, he hid behind a wall because he figured it was the safest place to be. Jane wonders in a cloud-shaped bubble, “Why couldn’t YOU be brave and adventurous….like THOR!”

The stage is set for further deception and misunderstanding. I think what appeals to me most about this love triangle is that it reminds me of so many other wonderful tales of hidden identity and unspoken love. Whether it’s Cyrano de Bergerac hiding behind his enormous nose, or P.G. Wodehouse’s Bertie Wooster helping out a romantically-challenged buddy from the Drones Club, I’ve always enjoyed stories that derive equal energy from irony, pathos and a wicked sense of screwball comedy.

For the time being, Thor has a lot more on his mind than dames, so he has not yet really noticed Jane Foster. But he will. And I look forward to that, and to lots more fun with the God of Thunder.

We’ll get back to Thor in a couple of weeks, but before we do, next time we’ll make a quick stop to see how another Marvel hero deals with those bothersome Commies!

Want to read this comic on your computer? Marvel has a scan!
Want to own this story? Buy the Masterworks!
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FANTASTIC FOUR #6: Double Trouble?

Posted on June 7, 2012 by Chrissy

Published: September 1962

“Captives of the Deadly Duo!”
Script: Stan Lee
Pencils: Jack Kirby
Inks: Dick Ayers, Joe Sinnott
Letters: Art Simek

I wrote a brief synopsis of this story. Very brief. 260 words. I was all ready to submit my employment application at Reader’s Digest Condensed Books, but then I decided this synopsis was SO brief that it sucked all the fun out of this story. And there’s so much fun in this story, if you cut it down to “Just the facts, ma’am,” you’re missing the best parts. So let’s just start at the top and work our way through.

We begin with the Invisible Girl making her way through a crowd that is looking up at a fiery display by her brother, the Human Torch. Some in the crowd are excited, but others skeptical. One fat man says “I could no more believe in the Fantastic Four than I could believe in flying saucers.” Well…hello, chubby! If I’m not mistaken, by this time, the FF have already battled the Skrulls, and other superheros have tangled with the Stone Men from Saturn, and the Toad Men. So, in this universe, beings from outer space are already yesterday’s new. I think anyone holding a skeptical view of flying saucers in this universe at this time is woefully out of touch.

When Sue gets back to the Baxter Building, she finds the others there, answering their mail. Reed says “our mail,” not “fan mail,” but that’s clearly what it is. One letter is from little Tommy in the hospital, so Reed decides to stretch himself over to the kid’s hospital window and pay a visit.

During this visit, by the way, we learn from Reed that his costume can stretch to any length because it is woven from chemical fibers containing “unstable molecules.” I doubt this “science” actually makes any sense, but it sounds good. I guess some of the actual fans were starting to ask the serious questions, so Stan decided to start addressing these issues right there in the story!

Another letter is not so much “fan” mail as it is a threat. The Yancy Street Gang issues Thing a physical challenge. Now, here I am speaking from my limited knowledge. In the stories I’ve read so far, I don’t recall if we ever actually meet anyone from the Yancy Street Gang, but I do know they are frequently mentioned as a point of irritation for Thing. I’m not sure where all this comes from. It’s hard to believe that Thing would have had any dealings with a “gang” in his former incarnation as Ben Grimm, test pilot. I think more than anything, the Yancy Street Gang distraction is just played for laughs, since it always gets Thing so aggravated.

I get such a kick out of these fictional characters answering their fan mail. The Fantastic Four are the only superheroes who are “out of the closet,” so to speak, and Stan takes full advantage of that by turning them into celebrities. Of course later other Marvel superheroes will have their own fan clubs, and we’ll see meetings of these clubs within the stories themselves, but the FF are the only superheroes who can fully enjoy their celebrity status.

These little scenes involving fan mail must have also been very exciting for the actual fans at the time. I’m sure many kids hoped to see a reference to their particular piece of fan mail in the actual comic. Maybe even little Tommy in the hospital….was he perhaps based on some kid in that same situation, who wrote in asking a question about Mr. Fantastic’s fantastic stretching suit? Even if he wasn’t, he could have been. Stan really knew how to involve his audience, make them feel a part of the process. Hats off to Stan!

And now, back to our story…

Torch had been out looking for Doctor Doom, but didn’t find him. Discussion ensues, in which Doom and Sub-Mariner are mentioned as worthy opponents. Now, if you’ll remember from our last run-in with Sub-Mariner, Sue kind of has a crush on the King of the Sea. When his name is mentioned, she defends him, coming up with a legitimate reason for him being a super-villain: he’s been “hurt.”

Boo hoo, poor Sub-Mariner!

But at the moment, Sub-Mariner (remember, he is also called Namor, and I’ll call him that from now on because it’s much easier to type than “Sub-Mariner”) is happily swimming with the porpoises in the sea. And I do mean happily! Just look at him:

He doesn’t look like a villain at all! Perhaps Sue is right about him after all, and he’s not the threat we supposed him to be.

You know, it occurred to me, looking at this picture of Namor swimming with the porpoises that here is a “villain” who can indeed take time to smell the roses (or the seaweed, if you will) and enjoy something in his life other than the formulating of his evil plans to destroy the FF and/or take over the world. Doctor Doom, on the other hand…not so much. I simply can’t imagine Doom ever looking happy, or smelling roses, or seaweed, or anything other than poisonous gases he plans to siphon into the living quarters of the Fantastic Four. That’s about the only thing that could make him happy, I think.

But Namor appears happy, at least for the moment. However, Doom has other plans for Namor. He finds him and reminds him of how the human race has wronged his people, and of course the first order of business should be getting rid of “Humanity’s Defenders,” the Fantastic Four! Namor is on board with this plan…as long as Sue is not harmed. You see, he’s got a crush on her, the same way she does on him. In fact, we see that he’s got a framed photo of her in his undersea bachelor pad!

Having no qualms about doing damage to the other three members of the FF, Namor agrees to assist Doom by sneaking a “grabber” into the Baxter Building. What, pray tell, is a “grabber”? Well, apparently it’s an invention from the evil genius mind of Dr. Doom (“MWAHHAAHAAHAAA!!!”) whereby incredibly strong magnetic force can be used to lift impossibly large and heavy objects. You’ve seen the Planet Fitness commercial? Well, it’s like that, only a million times more.

Did I mention that Namor has a framed photo of Sue Storm? Well, turns out she has a picture of Namor as well, though not as prominently displayed. She’s hiding it behind some books in the library. Really now, Sue, how old are we? What grade are we in? And what grade is Johnny in when he finds the photo? First he taunts her about her secret crush, then destroys the photo by fire. Reed and Thing rush in, and when they find out what’s going on, Reed demands, “I think you owe us an explanation, Sue!”

Owe US an explanation? Really, Reed? US? What about ME? How about “Hey, Sue, you and I are engaged to be married, I thought you loved me. But if you love me, why are you secretly nursing a crush on another man?” Never mind that the other man is their arch-enemy….he’s another man! You would think Reed would object on that basis.

And maybe he would have, if the scene had time to play out to its logical conclusion. But as soon as Sue mentions that she feels there is something “gentle” about Namor…he appears on the scene! (He flew through the window.) Thing wants to clobber Namor, and Johnny runs rings of fire around him, but Sue jumps to Namor’s defense and gets the others to listen to him. He tells them that his is “a lonely kingdom,” and he comes seeking “a lasting friendship…of more value than any fleeting taste of revenge.”

So! Was Sue right about Namor after all? Is he gentle? Is he kind? Is he just sad and misunderstood? Oh, poor Namor, how badly the humans have treated you!

But wait! What’s this? Before Namor can whisk away “this charming young lady on a tour of the city,” the Baxter Building begins to rise up into the air. Yes, you heard me right. The entire skyscraper becomes detached from its foundation and is pulled up into the air, even into the “ionosphere.” This, of course, is all due to the “grabber,” which Namor has planted in the basement (apparently just before he flew in the window). Doctor Doom is in a “rocket plane” above, pulling the building higher and higher above the Earth.

As they rise, eventually there are problems with lack of oxygen (Johnny can’t flame on) and lack of gravity. Even Thing is weightless! Reed attempts to reach Doom’s rocket plane and is burned by a burst of flames. (Don’t worry, folks, he’s okay, just out of commission for the rest of the story.)

Thing and Namor are going at it, weightlessly battling as Doctor Doom’s voice is heard:

I think it is right after this that Namor changes his alliance. Realizing he’s been double-crossed, he calls Doom a “jackal” and vows to deal with him. First, he dives into the building’s water tank to renew his strength, then does a quick hop, skip and a jump through the darkness of space, using meteorites as stepping stones, and lands on the back of Doom’s plane.

Okay now, this is not exactly the Fantastic Four battling the Deadly Duo, but instead we are about to see two super-villains battling each other. And in fact, these are the two super-villains that have been at the top of my Villian Valuation list. Number One battles Number Two! Who will win?

Well, we know for this story, at least, Namor must emerge victorious, because he is fighting not only to save his life, but the lives of the Fantastic Four (though I don’t think he is as concerned about Reed, Johnny and Thing, as he is about Sue). Still, he makes his attempts to thwart the bad Doctor, and very quickly Doom’s evil genius brain makes a major mistake. Seems Doom is not aware that among Namor’s numerous superpowers, he possesses the qualities of an electric eel. When Doom zaps Namor with a jolt of electricity, it doesn’t kill him. No, instead, Namor is able to absorb the electricity in his body, then shoot it back at Doom!

“OWWW!!” Yes, big bad Dr. Doom actually yells “OWWW!!” With two exclamation points. Namor has outdone Doctor Doom! Woo hoo! However, he doesn’t die. He isn’t even knocked out. He escapes the electrified cabin of the aircraft and hitches a ride on a passing meteorite, drifting off into space…never to be seen again?

Nah. Doubt that. He’ll be back. But for the time being, everyone is safe, and “the stray individuals who witness the return of the Baxter Building write it off as a bad dream. A hallucination resulting from the anxieties that plague our nuclear society.” (I have to admit, I had a little chuckle at that line.)

Once the “grabber” floats off and finds the mother ship (Doom’s rocket plane) Namor hurtles both to the bottom of the sea, “where they can do no further harm!” Namor himself returns to the sea, no doubt to relax up in his undersea bachelor pad, a large domed villa in a field of swaying underwater vegetation, complete with coral easy chair, sponge footstool and a jellyfish for a pet. Hear what he says as he departs:

“Perhaps someday, when I am no longer haunted by bitter memories of my lost people, I may return…but until then, this is where I belong! In the sea which is my home!”

There’s a certain poetry in the way he speaks, which I find very satisfying. However, I have to tell you, I feel a bit cheated by this story. The title page asks “Have the FF at last met their match when mighty Sub-Mariner and evil Doctor Doom team up??” The obvious answer to that question is a big fat resounding NO. Not yet. So in a way, this almost seems like a bait and switch.

But what’s more, overall I saw very little “teamwork” between our two villains. Namor comes out more of a hero than a villain by the end of this story. He saves not only himself, but also his beloved Sue (and almost despite himself, the other members of the FF). And not only that, in the end, he goes away. He just goes away. He doesn’t go away MAD (like any self-respecting super-villain would) but sort of sad and nostalgic, deciding he ought to lay low until he’s got all his personal issues sorted out.

Namor is much too nice, and much too sensitive for a super-villain. I never really felt like he was “teaming up” with Doom. Doom was just using him, because he needed someone to walk in and plant the “grabber” in the basement. That’s all. After that, Doom was perfectly ready to discard Namor. Doom never really showed any true signs that he valued Namor’s propensity to do evil and make trouble. He knew Namor had a grudge against the FF, and so he manipulated the Sea King to serve his OWN evil purposes. Namor was his pawn. There was no real “teamwork” involved.

But seeing these two in action, I would have to say Dr. Doom remains firmly entrenched on the top of my Villian Valuation chart. Namor, I’m afraid, is going to drop a couple of notches. Not because I don’t like him. I DO like him! That’s the problem! He’s much too likeable for a villain. At least at this point. Things may change in the future, but right now, with Namor returning to the sea to swim with porpoises and moon over his framed picture of Sue Storm until such time as he is “no longer haunted by bitter memories of my lost people,” I would have to say he is currently out of the villain game, and off my list.

In fact, if you think of it, the ONLY reason the FF survived this ordeal at the hands of Doctor Doom was because Namor was there to act heroically when they could not (due to lack of oxygen and gravity). If not for Namor, Doom may have been able to put an end to the FF! ::shudder:: Actually, that’s kind of a scary thought.

So we shall think about it no more. Instead, we shall say a few words about Sue and Namor before heading on to the next comic mag. This story was chock full of great Sue-Mariner stuff (see, I’m doing what they do in FanFiction, hyphenating the two names of the characters you like to see in a “ship”). The fact that they each have a picture of each other…how adorable, right? And Sue defends him to the others, even though, in her own words, “How can I explain something I don’t understand myself?” She’s confused, and torn, and this whole business is incredibly and deliciously angsty.

What is the attraction here? Could it merely be that she likes a man with superpowers? Well, she’s already got in her fiancé, Reed. So that’s probably not it. Instead, I go back to what I said in an earlier entry, about how Namor told her she was beautiful, and Reed probably never shows her this much attention. In fact, when Reed finds out his fiancé has been secretly crushing on another man, his first reaction is “you owe US an explanation.” No mention of you owe ME an explanation. What’s Sue supposed to think about that? How is she supposed to think Reed feels about their relationship if he is not jealous and wanting a PERSONAL explanation? If I’m Sue, at this point I’m thinking, “Hey, I might want to hold off ordering those wedding invitations.” Personally, I think this little incident tells us a lot more about Reed than it does about Sue. And it definitely tells us that all is not well in Paradise.

But now another idea occurs to me. Sue says she does not understand why she is attracted to Namor. May I propose that the very reason she is attracted to him is because she knows (or at least thinks) that this will make Reed notice her. Maybe subconsciously she’s TRYING to make him jealous. Yeah, well, if that’s the case, her subconscious needs to go back to the drawing board. Sure Reed is Mr. Fantastic, Mr. Flexible who can bend and stretch in every direction, but when it comes to romance, personally I find he has all the appeal of a cardboard box. And if something doesn’t change soon, Sue may begin to feel that way too.

I said I had one more thing to say about Sue-Mariner, but now one more additional point has occurred to me, and I want to briefly mention my feelings about the way Johnny behaved when he found his sister’s hidden photograph. Yes, of course I can understand that he was upset. I think he likes Reed and would like to see Sue marry Reed, and it’s obvious that he doesn’t like Namor, and probably understands Sue’s attraction to that overgrown fishman even less than she does. But burning the picture? Why?

Burning the picture isn’t going to make Sue like Namor any less, and in fact it’s probably going to magnify her “Us Against Them” mentality so that she feels she can’t trust or share her feelings about Namor with anyone. Johnny’s reaction was very much gut-level, emotional, immature. Like a hot-headed teenager. Which is what he is. But I just didn’t like that he burned his sister’s personal property, even as she’s proclaiming “You’ve got no right to do that!” Sorry, I side with Sue on this one. The others may not like what’s going on, but as far as I’m concerned, this situation did not call for the destruction of personal property. Bad, Johnny!

Okay, now I’m done! But before I go, let me suggest you check out the adjustments to my Villain Valuation page above.

Next up: We revisit a certain blonde Thunder God, who singlehandedly battles the Red Threat AND acquires his first groupie, all in one day! No one could ever accuse Marvel’s superheroes of not living life to the fullest!

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INCREDIBLE HULK #3: Who’s in Charge Here?

Posted on May 31, 2012 by Chrissy

Published: September 1962

“Banished to Outer Space”
Script: Stan Lee
Pencils: Jack Kirby
Inks: Dick Ayers
Letters: Art Simek

In this third issue of The Incredible Hulk, our dubious hero meets The Ringmaster, but that’s just about the least interesting thing that happens in this story. The Ringmaster doesn’t even appear until page 15 of 24. He almost seems an afterthought. Because, at least in my estimation, fighting villains is not really what this story is about. I think this story is about Stan trying to figure out what the heck to do with Hulk, now that he’s created him. It’s almost like Stan suddenly realizes “Oh crap! I’ve created this ‘hero’ that has no redeeming social values. How can I bring him under control? How can I make him more hero-like?”

Think about it. In these early issues, the only thing about Hulk that is under control is that he appears at night, and reverts to Bruce Banner with the light of day. However, while he is the Hulk, he is just this raging maniac, mad at the world, out to get anyone and anything that crosses his path. Up to this point he really has no purpose, and there’s no way to predict what he’s going to do.

SMASH!
Well…Hulk, SMASH! That’s about all we can be sure of. But perhaps Stan was beginning to feel that issue after issue of Hulk smashing everything in his path, while all of mankind’s efforts to subdue him are to no avail, was going to wear thin after a while. Monster fight, monster escape, monster live to fight another day.

Hulk needs some direction. He needs purpose. I might be wrong in my interpretation, but that’s what I think is going on here.

When the story begins, Hulk is locked in the underground cell Banner built for him, guarded by the only person who knows the secret, “tense teenager” Rick Jones. Military Police track down Jones and bring him to General “Thunderbolt” Ross, who says they need Hulk to test a new missile rocket, because “there isn’t a man living who could stand the force of its G-pull…except the Hulk!” At first Rick declares “Cool it, Mister! Nothin’ can make me rat on the Hulk!” but after the General describes the situation as a matter of national security, Jones caves and goes to fetch Hulk.

The uncontrollable Hulk chases Jones on to the launch pad, and Jones tricks him into the rocket’s cabin, all the while thinking, “I sure hope I did the right thing, betraying him this way!” I thought that sentiment was a bit off…don’t you think? Is there ever a time when it’s a “right thing” to betray someone?

After the rocket is shot into outer space, we learn that General Ross is more full of trickery and betrayal than even Rick Jones. This is no “test,” and he has no intention of bringing Hulk back. “He’ll never return alive to menace the Earth again!” (Add, if you will, villainous laugh, “Muwahahaha!”)

RADIATION
Meanwhile, in the rocket, Hulk reverts to Banner and is subjected to another radiation bath of “those mysterious, powerful rays about which so little is truly known.”

Back on Earth, Rick Jones overhears General Ross bragging about what REALLY happened, and Jones leaps into action to save Banner/Hulk by fiddling around with the missile control panel. At the same moment he is touching the controls, a shock wave of radiation from the rocket zaps him (“OWW!”) and the capsule plummets back to earth.

Jones runs out to the crash site, fearful that, it being daytime, Banner will be found dead inside the capsule, but instead…

HULK!!

Yes, it’s daytime, and Hulk is still about. And he’s glowing. And he’s pissed. Jones runs away, and Hulk pursues, and seems about to kill the boy, until Jones stumbles upon an amazing new development:

Oh yes, what those radiation rays will do! Turns out Hulk is now the mindless servant of teenager Rick Jones, compelled to obey his every word. He’s like a trained dog!

But only while Jones is awake, apparently. As soon as he falls asleep, Hulk reverts to his usual berserk self. Jones finds him, pursues him, and returns him to the underground prison.

While Jones tries to stay awake and figure out what to do, Stan treats us to a retelling of the Hulk origin story—I guess for any readers who have come late to the party.

Then suddenly, our story now switches to The Ringmaster, the head of a traveling circus who uses the power of hypnosis to immobilize entire towns while his circus cronies rob everyone blind. Hmmm… sound strangely familiar? Remember the Miracle Man from FF#3? Are we running out of ideas for good criminals? Repeating ourselves already? Or was Stan, in fact, making a point that the villain of this piece is not what’s most important? That any old villain would do?

Of course because we are at the circus, we have a lot of interesting visuals involving clowns and elephants, even “The Fat Lady,” who is strong enough to carry away massive amounts of necklaces and bracelets.

So the circus theme works on that level. And of course, since it is a public performance, Rick Jones ends up at the circus, hypnotized by The Ringmaster. But before he is completely immobilized, Jones calls to Hulk in his mind, his thoughts stretching out over the miles to activate the mighty monster.

Hulk arrives on the scene, and…and what’s this??? The Army, the Navy and the Marines cannot subdue the Hulk, but a ragtag bunch of circus performers knock him out with a pressure hose, chain him up, cart him away, and make a mockery of him in their next show. (I guess the Ringmaster has hypnotized Hulk as well?)

Very quickly though, the FBI has follows the track, snapped everyone out of their hypnotic spell, and Rick Jones is along when they arrive at the next circus show, ready to arrest The Ringmaster. Hulk hears Jones’ voice, goes crazy, and “now under the control of a vengeful Rick Jones,” Hulk captures The Ringmaster.

Of course, no matter how much good Hulk ends up doing, as soon as the army arrives on the scene, they point their guns at Hulk. Rick commands Hulk to escape, and together they “fly” away, leaving a wrathful General Ross in their wake, swearing thusly:

So that’s the story. And it’s not a bad story. But not so much because of the villain. As I mentioned earlier, the villain almost seems beside the point. In fact I think the villain, and his hypnosis skills, is only interesting and significant as a mirror to what is the truly significant development in this story: Rick Jones’ sudden ability to control Hulk.

MONSTER MOTIVATION
At best, Hulk is an unthinking toddler (albeit a very strong unthinking toddler). At best, he’s a monster. His only motivation, up to this point, is to “get away from it all.” He just wants everybody to leave him alone. And since people (i.e., General Ross and the military under his command) won’t leave him alone, he feels compelled to destroy the human race. Hulk is extremely volatile and self-centered. He’s all id and no ego. He has no purpose other than self-preservation. What kind of hero is this? I guess this is why I have never understood Hulk, never appreciated him as a “hero.” Some more stuff may happen with him down the road, but what we’ve seen of him up to this point in the comic series is fairly representative of how I perceive Hulk.

Was he like this in the TV series? I don’t know, because I never watched it. Having seen him now in a couple of movies, I haven’t altered my perception of him too much. Though in the Avengers movie, I think, we do see a glimmer of his being able to “play well with others,” be part of a team devoted to some ideal higher than simply “Leave me alone!”

A TEENAGER WITH POWER!
I think Hulk can evolve, and may evolve, but for right now, I am thoroughly enchanted by this idea of Rick Jones serving as his guidance system. Jones may not be the most ethical and heroic character ever, but he has at least shown some basic qualities one would like to see in a hero: loyalty and patriotism spring immediately to mind. Jones does not want to see good people get hurt. As an orphan boy, he really hasn’t had much opportunity to do anything heroic. But now that Hulk is under his control…well, I see all kinds of story possibilities opening up before us!

I don’t know how long Jones is going to maintain this control over Hulk. I’m not really sure what he’s going to do with this incredible power. I’m curious to see if the old adage will hold true: Power corrupts, absolute power corrupts absolutely. Will Rick Jones become overwhelmed by this sudden sense of power, and decide to use the Hulk to achieve his own personal goals? Maybe to knock out some rival who made fun of him in school? To smash the car of a teacher who gave him a D on a term paper? Will he send Hulk after General Ross, in retaliation for Ross’ evil plan to rid the world of Hulk?

From the beginning I’ve said that Hulk has not really interested me, but now in this issue, my interest is piqued. Hulk as an angry monosyllabic monster does not interest me. But a teenager with absolute control over that monster….now THAT’S good stuff!

My curiosity is also piqued as to why Hulk was still around in the daytime. Those gamma rays are messing with the mythology! But then not really, because the canon mythology of Hulk (“Don’t make me angry; you wouldn’t like me when I’m angry.”) is not yet in place. In fact, when I saw Banner get bombarded with those rays in outer space, my first thought was “Ah! So this is how Stan is going to make that adjustment.” But then that didn’t happen. So it was a bit of a disappointment…but then not a disappointment, because I’m really on board with this idea of Rick Jones being able to control Hulk.

But as I’ve said before, it still doesn’t make sense that people are not able to figure out that when Jones is with Hulk, Banner is nowhere to be found, and Hulk is wearing rags that somewhat resemble the last outfit Banner was seen wearing. It doesn’t make sense that no one questions Jones about this.

Well, maybe in a future issue.

WHA…???
But then again, there were several things in this issue that did not make sense. The military police that pick up Jones do not investigate his whereabouts to find the secret cave where Hulk is being contained. After Jones meets with General Ross, there are apparently no orders given to keep an eye on that kid and follow him and find out where he goes and everything he knows. Because “after convincing himself that the troops have not followed him, and that the secret of the hidden cavern will remain his secret, Rick Jones sets out to free the Hulk.”

Now. Did they really let him get all the way to the cavern without watching what he’s doing? We know that eventually Hulk will chase Jones to the missile site, and there “tight-lipped troops with weapons cocked” follow Hulk’s every move as Rick Jones leads him on to the launchpad. Well…maybe they figured if this plan works, Hulk will be gone, and there’ll be no need to know where he HAD been hidden?

Okay. Maybe that can be explained. But there’s no explaining this: after Jones overhears Ross bragging about how he got rid of Hulk, he is able to sneak in to the missile control panel (“This is my chance! No one’s looking!”) and pull the switch that sends the capsule back to earth. Now surely THAT was not in General Ross’ evil plan! That oversight of having no one at all manning the control panel so that a stray teenager can just sneak in and start pulling switches, that one act is what unravels General Ross’ plan altogether!

And then the capsule crashes, and no one else knows about it, and no one else is there, and Rick Jones is close enough to run right out to the crash site. Huh??? Is this the way the military did business in the 1960’s? Or perhaps only in comic books. Remember, in the first issue of Hulk, Banner’s team included a Soviet spy, and a bunch of minimum wage mall cops who could not keep a kid in his jalopy off the testing grounds. So, the incredibly shoddy way these space flights and scientific tests are being run may not be consistent with reality, but they do at least seem to be consistent within the Marvel comic book world.

VILLAIN VALUATION
When it comes to the Villain Valuation, I am hard pressed to decide who exactly is the villain in this story. Of course, our first thought is the hypnotist in the goofy outfit with the whirly-twirly mind control gadget on his top hat. So I will say a word or two about The Ringmaster. As I’ve already mentioned, I find him disappointingly similar to the Miracle Man. However, Miracle Man used his powers of mass hypnosis in order to carry out his plan for world domination. The Ringmaster just wants your wallet. He’s a petty thief. He’s got a power, but doesn’t appreciate all he could do with it. He’s base, he’s low, he’s actually kind of stupid.

That’s the Ringmaster. But what about our other villain…General “Thunderbolt” Ross? What? You say. Ross is not a villain! Well, probably not. Probably no more than…Hulk is a “hero.” Right? And if Hulk IS a hero, then Ross is a villain, with a plan to “get him” and destroy him.

I think at first Ross was acting in the capacity of General of the armed forces, sworn to protect the American people, but by the bottom of page 24, I would swear it’s now personal. Hulk has evaded his capture at least a couple of times by this point, and this makes the General look like a fool, and weak. Not only is Ross annoyed, he’s been humiliated. How is he going to show his face in the General’s Club if he keeps letting the big green monster and his teenage sidekick outsmart him?

I won’t put Ross on my “Villain Valuation” list (which by the way, I hope you are visiting, at the top of the page, to see how the villains I’ve met so far are stacking up), because other than his animosity towards Hulk, he’s really a decent guy. Well, except for one more flaw: even though Dr. Bruce Banner is this super-intelligent rocket scientist (remember, the Toad Men thought he was the smartest man on the planet), still General Ross doesn’t think Banner is good enough for his daughter Betty. If Banner isn’t good enough for Betty, then who is? Ross is being mighty selective, if you ask me. He probably wants JFK to marry his daughter! (But I think he was already taken.)

ARE WE GOING SOMEWHERE WITH ALL THIS?
Speaking of Betty, we didn’t see her in this one! We didn’t see much of Banner, either. I felt like this story was mostly a set-up for new kinds of Hulk stories that are coming down the pike. It seems that Hulk is slowly being molded into something that is more like the “super-hero” that will someday be part of the Avengers. Now he can “fly” (which is not really flying, by the way, it’s just that he can jump really really high) and it seems that Rick Jones will have a little more to say about what kinds of activities Hulk will undertake. At the very least, in this new arrangement, Hulk won’t be running after his only friend, trying to kill him. That wasn’t really going to work for too long, was it? I think Stan did a nice job turning things around a bit, to get this story going in the right direction. The more I read of Hulk, the more I am looking forward to future issues.

ARGHHH!!

Join me next time for an important first in Marvel’s Silver Age. It’s double the fun–and double the trouble for our heroes–when the odds are four against two!

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