JOURNEY INTO MYSTERY #90: Topsy Turvy!

Published: March, 1963

Here is a quick and easy Thor story that has a few chuckle factors, so I’ll say a few words, but only a few, and then let’s move on to something meatier. The first thing we notice is new credits: Art by Al Hartley and lettering by Terry Szenics. I don’t know about you, but I can’t tell one guy’s lettering from another. Maybe you have to be a real comic book connoseiuer…conossouer…conna…nerd, to see those minute differences. It’s like, to me, wine is wine. I don’t get all this swishing it in the glass, sniffing the “bouquet,” holding it up to the light. Will it give me a buzz, and how much does it cost? That’s all I need to know.

But as for the artist, yes, I can see a difference. Almost immediately the art slaps you in the face, when Don Blake laments that he can never get up enough courage to tell Jane his true feelings. “Why don’t I just up and tell Jane that I love her? What am I afraid of?”

When I look at this picture, I can’t help thinking, “Well, Don, maybe you’re afraid Jane is going to laugh you off the face of the planet because in relation to the rest of your body, your head is the size of a BUICK!” I think the artist is trying to emphasize Blake’s frailness and lameness while at the same time depicting Thor’s manliness in the large, square head and jaw. Nice try, Al…but it just doesn’t work.

On the other hand, Jane Foster is nicely drawn. Russ often laments that in these earliest comics you’re just not going to see attractive depictions of women. I agree with him, but this Jane Foster is almost cute. So here I say: Good going, Al!

Anyway, Blake decides to be “a man, not a mouse,” and reveal his love for Jane, but before he can take a breath, Odin ominously appears to remind him that he’s bound to never reveal his true identity. Well, yeah, we know that. But Blake wasn’t planning to reveal his secret identity to Jane. So… not really sure what all that was about. But with his confidence now handily deflated by Odin, Blake chickens out.

*Sigh*… Unspoken and unrequited love must continue as such.

In other news, we meet the Xartans from planet Xarta, where battles are won by the trickery of shape-shifting. The clever and ruthless warlord Ugarth contemplates retirement (“After this conquest, I retire!”), and son Zano is eager to prove he can walk a mile in Dad’s shoes.

Next thing we know, the whole city is in a tizzy as workers paint polka dots on bridges, cars are allowed to drive on sidewalks and people are commanded to walk in the gutter! Oh, what a topsy turvy world we live in! When Jane Foster berates Dr. Blake for treating the indigent without demanding payment…well, this is just too much! Blake stomps his cane, transforms to Thor, and flies off to meet his good friend Mayor Harris, to find out what in blazes is going on.

But Harris is acting just as wacky as everyone else, and Thor retreats to contemplate the mystery. He recalls a time when Odin “counseled his sons” with this philosophical gem: “When something puzzles you, always seek the simplest, most obvious explanation…no matter how impossible it might seem.” This maxim is commonly known as Occam’s Razor—though it’s unlikely Odin would admit to borrowing from earthly philosophy. No, I’m quite sure Odin would claim it was he, mighty King of the Asgardians, who invented this bit of wisdom. And who knows? Maybe he did, and Occam borrowed from him!

I found myself momentarily distracted by the appearance of Odin’s “sons.” We think of Thor and Loki as Odin’s sons, but in this picture, it appears Thor has a twin! What!? Why have we not heard of this sibling? Is he truly Thor’s twin, or perhaps just an Asgardian warrior in similar attire? Why did the writer and illustrator even go here, showing two “sons” of Odin, unless there was a plan to make something of this at a later time?

But getting back to Odin’s advice, in addition to Occam’s Razor, these words also remind me of Sherlock Holmes’ truism: “Once you eliminate the impossible, whatever remains, no matter how improbable, must be the truth.” Well, Occam and Odin are not even bothering to do the work of eliminating other possibilities. They simply start with the obvious and say, “Yeah, that’s it. Problem solved. Let’s go home.”

So, grasping Odin’s wisdom, Thor concludes that the crazy people must be imposters! Setting off to search the city (not sure for what, exactly), when he spies some downed trees, he surmises, “The trees below have been felled as though by a huge scythe…or a large aircraft…perhaps…a SPACESHIP!”

Huh?

Didn’t Thor just get through embracing the acumen that the simplest explanation must necessarily be the correct one? So then, how does he come up with “Trees down = spaceship”? Wielding a little Occam’s Razor of my own, I surmise that perhaps on Asgard the simplest solution is a far cry from what makes sense on earth; perhaps on Asgard, “Trees down=spaceship” is a common occurrence.

That makes sense…doesn’t it?

Well…perhaps, but in this instance, Thor happens to be right! Almost immediately, he discovers the partially hidden Xartanian spaceship, which pulls him in with magnetic force, separating him from Mjolnir, and causing him to revert to Blake.

Immediately, we are faced with another difficulty, as we encounter a monumental logic puzzle along the lines of “Can God make a rock He can’t lift?” When Thor is pulled in by the spaceship, we are informed that “the strange magnetic force is too powerful for even the mighty Thor.” Yet, on page two, the narrator informed us that Thor is “the mightiest creature in all this universe.” Well… is he or isn’t he?? Is he mightier than a magnetic force, or not? And if he’s not, then he’s not really the “mightiest,” is he? You can’t have it both ways, unless there is NO “creature” in the universe able to overcome magnetic force. It wasn’t that long ago that Hulk defeated the Toad Mean from outer space, and they claimed to be the masters of magnetic force!

When Blake is brought inside the spaceship, he finds the other humans that have been captured—Jane, and Mayor Harris. Which makes me wonder…where is everyone else? Or have the Xartans been able to cause such monumental chaos by simply replacing one old mayor and one cute little nurse? No, that doesn’t make sense. They must have other prisoners; they must be on the other spaceships. Right? That would make sense, to split up your prisoners into multiple holding areas, so they could not conspire and revolt. That would be an intelligent strategy for an invading force.

But from what we’ve seen so far in the Marvel Universe, being from outer space does not automatically guarantee a high level of intelligence, so there’s really no telling if there are other prisoners, and where they might be. But, we do know this: between Blake, Harris and Jane Foster, the three earthlings should be able to devise a plan for overcoming their captors.

This seems especially certain when the Xartans almost immediately reveal how incredibly dull-witted they really are. They start by making the classic movie mistake of revealing the extent of their powers, quickly followed by bragging about their strategy for conquering earth. Is this stupidity, or simple pride? How many times have we seen this in the movies? So often, it’s become a cliché.

But perhaps it was in comic mags like this that the cliché got started?

Next, when Blake offers to lead the Xartans directly to Thor in exchange for his own freedom, Ugarth heartily agrees. You know, for someone who’s been on the job of Ruthless Warlord to the point that he’s now considering retirement, he hasn’t quite gotten the hang of it yet, has he?

I love this panel, because there’s so much going on. First, we see that Blake is smart enough to dream up a scheme for defeating the enemy, and we hear the ruthless warlord agreeably complying with his captive’s suggestion. But the ever-faithful Jane Foster exclaims, “No, Dr. Blake! Don’t do it!” Even though earlier, she had all but written him off as a timid, poor soul who could never be as brave as her idol Thor, apparently she hasn’t stopped caring about him. And finally, there’s Mayor Harris, the completely ineffective leader criticizing the actions of others while he stands idly by.

When Blake gets outside with the Xartans, he finds Mjolnir and transforms to Thor, in which form he is compelled to fight the Xartans in three different incarnations. Son Zano is easily defeated, but Ugarth inflicts a bit of confusion, before Thor realizes he can create a rainstorm to reveal the location of his invisible enemy.

Outsmarted, the ruthless warlord crumbles like bacon. Thor flings him into outer space, and his people follow (presumably, after ejecting any earthly prisoners they might have been holding). A few Xartans remain, however, and Thor instructs them to turn into trees, knowing that as trees, they will not have the ability to think themselves back into their original form. Oh, that Thor! He’s pretty smart, huh? The Mayor heartily approves, and Jane fawns over her hero. In the end, Dr. Blake gives the audience a wink-wink nudge-nudge, saying “We can’t ALL be as brave as Thor!”

Well yeah, that’s really cute and all, but these sentiments and this story have done nothing to advance the overall storyline. Jane is still pining for both Blake and Thor, and Blake is no closer to revealing his love. So, overall, this was, mostly, a throwaway tale.

Sure, this was a lot of fun, but it raises more questions than it answers. Chief among these questions: who is Odin’s other son, and should we be on the lookout for future appearances? And: after seeing Thor battle the invisible Ugarth, can we assume that a rain shower would reveal Sue Storm to her enemies in the same way?

For those of you who have been reading comics for years, these questions might seem silly. I think I know the answers, but since I haven’t read very far, I can’t be sure. And Russ won’t tell me. He wants me to encounter the wonders of the Marvel Universe on my own as much as possible. And I want that too, so I look forward to the discovery.

My future is full of further adventures and mysteries as I continue along the meandering path here in the Marvelous Zone! There’s been a gaping pothole in this meandering path, but not to worry! Next time we meet, we’ll fill that pothole…with Iron!