Meanwhile…: February, 1965

JOURNEY INTO MYSTERY #113

“A World Gone Mad!”
Script: Stan Lee
Pencils: Jack Kirby
Inks: Chic Stone
Letters: Artie Simek

IN A NUTSHELL
Thor renounces his immortality and, as Don Blake, reveals his true identity to Jane. Enraged, Odin removes Thor’s powers, so when Don attempts to prove to Jane that he’s Thor, he fails, leading Jane to believe he’s delirious. At that moment, Grey Gargoyle attacks, seeking Thor. He chases Don through the streets, but he turns back into Thor with the aid of Honir, sent by Odin to ensure Thor’s survival. After defeating the Gargoyle, Don realizes he can’t give up being Thor, so he returns to Jane and assures her that the madness has left him.

WHAT’S HOT
PERHAPS TODAY I WILL LEARN A NEW WORD. And perhaps that word will be “mayhap.” I say again, Marvel Comics is a great place for increasing your vocabulary.

FORMALITIES. As Thor decides he will indeed forsake his Asgardian heritage in order to be with the woman he loves, he sets off to find his beloved…whom he refers to as “Jane Foster.” When Blake and Jane see each other again, she calls him “Dr. Blake.” These people have a lot to learn about how romance works. But a few panels later, they let their hair down and are “Don” and “My darling.” And I feel better about this relationship.

FLYING CHICKEN. Okay, this just struck me as funny. When Odin is out of sorts, he casts out his royal chef, throwing all manner of food after him, including a chicken, which appears to be flying. The temper of Odin paired with a flying chicken is what comedy is made of.

SPLIT SCREEN. In this story, we toggle back and forth between Earth and Asgard, making the whole business jam-packed and fast-paced. Do try to keep up!

LOOPHOLE. When Thor’s friends hear of his predicament on Earth, they wisely decide to act quickly, before Odin can instruct them not to. They’re not waiting, and they’re not asking permission. These are true friends.

SNAZZY CAR. As Blake and Jane flee the monstrous Gargoyle, at one point they take flight in Blake’s very snazzy, very sexy red convertible. For a dull doctor, he sure has got the automotive going on!

WHAT’S NOT
STONE WINGS. I just said Blake and Jane “take flight” in a snazzy car, and that’s cool. But when the Gargoyle notes that his stone wings give him the ability to flight, I’m thinking…not cool! Not buying it! In what universe does stone make you lighter than air? Science, please!

30 SECOND RULE. Honir touches Blake’s hand, imparting a magical 30 seconds for Blake to transform to Thor and conquer the Gargoyle. First of all, 30 seconds is not nearly enough time to do that, and the absurdity of it is furthered by the two Asgardians engaging in so much jibber-jabber, wasting precious seconds. Halfway through, Thor notes that he now has only 15 seconds left, and undertakes a series of actions that would clearly need at least five minutes. Why impose the artificial and ridiculous limit of thirty seconds, and then go on to nullify it by page upon page of time-eating story? The suspense is blown to bits by the reader’s incredulity.

LEAVE IT TO THE COPS. At the end, when Gargoyle is melted into an inanimate object, Jane wonders what will happen should he ever break free. Blake’s answer: “The police will handle it.” LMFAO! Really? When Gargoyle first appeared, Blake tells Jane to get a policeman…to summon the Avengers! But before they can arrive, it takes everything Thor has to conquer the Gargoyle on his own. Yet now, somehow, we’re supposed to believe “the police will take care of it.” Unless, by this, Blake is simply saying, “The police will call the Avengers.” Yeah. I think that works better.

“The Boyhood of Loki!”
Script: Stan Lee
Pencils: Jack Kirby
Inks: Vince Colletta
Letters: Artie Simek

IN A NUTSHELL
Young Thor and Loki watch a jousting battle, and they enter into a wager on the victor. Thor’s champion is about to win, when Loki casts a spell to help his favorite. The Asgardian warriors are quick to realize skullduggery, and they capture both boys. They accuse Loki of the spell, because they doubt that Thor would ever engage in trickery. Thor insists that they both be punished equally, and overwhelmed by his gallantry, they decide not to punish either youth. Overcome with jealousy over the unequal treatment, Loki vows to work harder than ever to destroy Thor.

WHAT’S HOT
HOT ART. I really enjoyed the artistic depictions of Loki in this tale, who believably looks like a downright miserable child. (pic 3.4)

WHAT’S NOT
NOT. This was a totally unnecessary story. We learned nothing we didn’t already know. Except that as children, Thor and Loki were forced to wear tunics displaying their first initial, a la Laverne and Shirley, in case they ever forget who they are, or get their clothes confused with that of the other little young gods in Asgardian kindergarten.

SAY WHAT??? Ultimately, this story raises more questions than it answers, because it once again thrusts into the spotlight that the “gods” of Asgard are born, go through childhood, and eventually age (as we see in Odin). What sort of “gods” are these? I’m not sure I understand. And they are called “Immortal” (as you’ll remember from the previous story, the Gargoyle was after the secret of Thor’s immortality), yet I believe it is possible for them to die. So…not actually immortal? So many questions, I can’t tackle it all here, but look forward to a deeper exploration of these conundrums in a future post.

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TALES OF SUSPENSE #62

“The Origin of the Mandarin!”
Script: Stan Lee
Pencils: Don Heck
Inks: Dick Ayers
Letters: Sam Rosen

IN A NUTSHELL
The Mandarin relates his origin to the captured Iron Man. Born into nobility, Mandarin lost both parents while an infant. After he reached adulthood, China’s regime confiscated his property. One day, his wanderings led him to an alien spaceship. Inside, he discovered ten rings that granted him immense powers, and with them, he subjugated the outskirts of China. Finishing his tale, Mandarin engages his death trap on Iron Man, but Iron Man escapes and intercepts a rocket. The Mandarin eludes Iron Man, and Iron Man returns home.

WHAT’S HOT
WELL, THAT CERTAINLY EXPLAINS A LOT. Mandarin’s backstory is tailor-made for a super-villain, complete with tragedy and a totally dysfunctional upbringing.

SURPRISE SURPRISE SURPRISE! Extraterrestrial influence is the last element I would have every imagined in the Mandarin’s backstory.

COMEDY TONIGHT. At the bottom of page eight, Iron Man stops in the middle of a world crisis to make a few self-deprecating jokes. (“I’m beginning to sound like some corny mad scientist in a Grad B movie!”) Which naturally leads to my next point…

SPIDEY, IS THAT YOU? During the fight scene with Mandarin, Iron Man is so chatty, I have to wonder if Stan was up late and getting confused and thought he was writing for Amazing Spider-Man.

BAKOOOO! I am a big fan of the onomatopoeic sound effects in Marvel Comics, and here is a new one, in case you were wondering what sound a firing tank gun might make, it’s “BAKOOOO!”

WHAT’S NOT
“KEEP HIM TALKING.” When Mandarin cannot resist the super-villain proclivity for needling his captured prey with a self-serving oration of “How I Did It,” Iron Man wisely deduces this will give him extra time to find a way out of his predicament. Will these super-villains never lean??

SORRY, I GOTTA RUN…Mandarin sets his elaborate death traps, but leaves Iron Man BEFORE he is actually dead. Like any good super-villain, he assumes his diabolical plan will succeed and feels no particular need to stick around and be certain. Clearly Mandarin is not a fan of James Bond movies.

TESTING, 123, TESTING? Mandarin sells a missile to China, but the Chinese don’t know that he has set the missile to reach Formosa (Taiwan). And it appears the Chinese decide to shoot it off without first programming in any particular coordinates! Now, it’s possible the Chinese did indeed enter their own coordinates, and Mandarin’s coordinates overrode those, but…nowhere in the story are we told that!! We’re left believing that the Chinese just fire off missiles willy-nilly with no particular concern for where they might land. Jeez…

DID I SAY THAT PART OUT LOUD? Why in the world does the Mandarin TELL Iron Man that his disintegrator ring takes 20 minutes to recharge? Does that particular strategy of revealing your weaknesses to your opponent really work for you, Mandarin?


“Break-Out in Cell Block 10!”
Script: Stan Lee
Pencils: Jack Kirby
Inks: Chic Stone
Letters: Art Simek

IN A NUTSHELL
Cap engages in an exhibition at a prison of how he would battle escaped convicts. Afterwards, the prison guards surround him in the cell block and reveal that they are, in fact, convicts, and they need Cap’s shield to help them open the final gate to the prison. They throw Cap in a prison cell, and unsuccessfully attempt to open the gate. Cap escapes his cell and defeats all the convicts. Later, the freed prison warden reveals that the only way to open the gate is to speak the words “Captain America.”

WHAT’S HOT
TRICKED! Nice twist right at the start there (when there was hardly anything there to be twisted at all) when it turns out it’s the prisoners impersonating prison officials. Cap may have many super powers, including Observation. (“I know that this job requires really RUGGED guards…but THESE fellas somehow look too…BRUTAL!”) However, Intuition is obviously not one of them.

THANKS BUT NO THANKS. Cap threw away the “magnetic gimmicks” Iron Man installed on his Shield because they ruined its “delicate balance.” Obviously, Cap’s the kind of guy who would rather drive stick shift. And he really doesn’t relish those newfangled push button telephones either!

CURSES! FOILED AGAIN! Cap escapes the jail cell by wedging a folded chewing gum wrapper between the lock and the door. How’s that for good ol’ (Captain) American ingenuity?

WHAT’S NOT
OPEN SESAME. At the end of the story, the warden reveals that the iron door only opens to the phrase “Captain America!” How adorable. Only, it’s not true, or it’s not working, because at least TWICE during the melee, someone clearly says “Captain America” while standing in front of the door! And even if this clever password was working, it’s not really that clever—is it?—in a jail setting, where superheroes are likely to be a frequent topic of conversation. (I suggest, instead, the name of the Warden’s family dog.)

NO WAY OUT. Wait. If the big iron gate is the only way out, how did Cap get in? Perhaps he fell in, through a giant plot hole?

BORED NOW…In the middle of one of the fight scenes, Cap says, “Look boys, I’m getting BORED with all this activity.” Sigh…So am I. Next story, please!

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STRANGE TALES #129

“The Terrible Trio!”
Script: Stan Lee
Pencils: Dick Ayers
Inks: Frankie Ray
Letters: Art Simek

IN A NUTSHELL
Johnny has to cancel his date with Dorrie when the Terrible Trio escape from prison. He searches for the convicts, but when his flame gives out, they capture him. Johnny escapes, but during the melee that follows, he gets stuck in the railroad tracks. He sends off a flare to alert Thing, but when Thing arrives to rescue the collapsed Torch, the Trio swoops in. Thing fends off an oncoming train, then captures the villains. Johnny reawakens, and Ben basks in recounting his victory.

WHAT’S HOT
CONTINUITY. In my recent feature on this month’s Amazing Spider-Man, I wrote at length about Doris Evans, expressing the same dismay Doris is now hurling directly at Johnny: “I don’t know what on earth I see in you!” A reference is even made to the “gentlemanly” Peter Parker whom Doris met in Amazing Spider-Man #21. What fabulous continuity! And by the way, it doesn’t make me change my mind about Doris at all.

COLLABORATION. In Doris’ defense, however, under the artistic direction of penciller Dick Ayers and inker Frankie Ray, she’s looking better than she ever has before. In addition, Handsome Harry actually looks handsome—as does Bull! So, with such good collaboration going on between Ayers and Ray, why, at the end of this issue, are we promised a new artist next time? If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it!

CHALLENGE CHALLENGED. It takes THREE villains of this caliber to face only one member of the Fantastic Four. It may be true that in this story the Trio faces both Torch and Thing, but not at the same time. Thing is absent at first, and Torch is knocked out later, so it’s really three-against-one in each case…and even then, the Terrible Trio can’t get the job done! As super-villains go, not actually so “terrible.”

WHAT’S NOT
DAMSEL IN DISTRESS? Being unconscious and bound to a train track is not a good look for a superhero. On the splash, Stan seems to recognize that the readers may not be on board with this Perils of Pauline rip-off and tries to disassociate himself with it before the story gets started.

HELLO, I CAN HEAR YOU! Handsome Harry has the weakest superpower ever: super-hearing! Of course, that’s only the weakest if you don’t count his being incredibly handsome as one of his “superpowers.” Either way, I maintain that my superpower of correctly being able to guess the correct size container for leftovers far exceeds anything Handsome Harry can bring to the table! (Hey! I’ll take on Sue Storm serving up a Thanksgiving dinner any day of the week!)

STUCK ON YOU. How is it that the Trio doesn’t fall off the precariously tilted Fantasticar? Are we witnessing one of their previously undisclosed superpowers? Or did Torch and Thing inexplicably get an assist from Paste Pot Pete?


“Beware Tiboro!”
Script: Don Rico
Art: Steve Ditko
Letters: Sam Rosen

IN A NUTSHELL
The scientists of the tv show The Twelfth Hour hold a Peruvian idol up to ridicule, but when the lights go out, then come back on, the hosts have disappeared. Alerted to the supernatural events, Strange arrives and deduces that they’ve been captured by Tiboro. Strange teleports to the sixth dimension, and battles Tiboro. Tiboro eventually admits defeat, but vows to return if earth’s civilization decays further. The rescued scientists offer to devote future episodes to Strange, but he casts a spell of forgetfulness over them.

WHAT’S HOT
NO EGO. I’m so impressed by how much of an ego Dr. Strange doesn’t have. Challenged by the scientists to defend the mystical arts, he quietly declines because he fervently believes the public is not ready. Later, after the scientists ridicule him on TV, Strange is called in to rescue them, and does so with expediency. When the scientists become believers in the mystic arts, they want to broadcast their newfound knowledge to the world—but Strange, true to his convictions, wipes their memories clean to prevent that from happening. For Strange, it’s not about him, it’s simply about doing what is RIGHT. Hey! I have an idea! Dr. Strange for President??

ZOOM. When Strange is stumped by the icon, he conducts a supernatural Zoom meeting with the Ancient One to glean more information. LOL, way too topical these days!

WHAT’S NOT
FAIR FIGHT? In the interest of “fair play,” Strange takes off his cloak after he supernaturally convinces Tiboro to put down his wand? But can fair play ever really be anticipated when tangling with a super-villain? Especially one who describes himself as “the spirit of decay”? It always frustrates me when the Hero’s Code goes too far.

CONSEQUENCES? And continuing my previous thought, when all is said and done, Strange simply lets Tiboro GO FREE with a stern warning to never do that again. Yeah, right, like that’s gonna happen…

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FANTASTIC FOUR #35

“Calamity on the Campus!”
Script: Stan Lee
Pencils: Jack Kirby
Inks: Chic Stone
Letters: Artie Simek

IN A NUTSHELL
While touring State U, the FF encounter Professor Gilbert, who is attempting to construct a super-powered being. Later, while Reed gives a lecture, Thing discovers that Diablo has returned, and has used a potion to instill life in Gilbert’s creation, whom he has christened Dragon Man. Diablo orders Dragon Man to protect him, and battle ensues. Sue ends the fight when she learns that Dragon Man responds to kindness. When Diablo attacks, Dragon Man saves them, and both Diablo & Dragon Man apparently drown in a frozen lake.

WHAT’S HOT
BE OUR GUEST! As the story at State U is beginning to settle in, we are treated to a guest appearance not only by Professor Xavier and Scott Summers, but also Peter Parker, who is scoping out his post-high school prospects. Extra points for the continuity of Johnny remembering Peter as “the guy Dorrie tried to get friendly with till I put the kibosh oh him!”

FILL IN THE BLANK. As the FF prepares to leave campus, someone mentions that they haven’t had this much excitement since they invited Jayne Mansfield to lecture on philosophy. Hmmm…wonder how that one turned out?

CLIFFHANGER. At the very end, we get a hint that Reed and Sue are perhaps soon to be engaged! Good news! Except…we’ve been here before, haven’t we? So I’ll hold off checking out their gift registry, at least until I see what happens in the next ish.

WHAT’S NOT
“SO! WE MEET AGAIN!” Yes, Diablo actually says this when he first sees Thing. He also tells poor little Dr. Gilbert, “I will show you wonders beyond your wildest dreams!” (Which naturally conjured up memories of Pedro in Napoleon Dynamite) Where does Diablo get these gems? From his pocket edition of “The Super-Villain’s Guide to Hackneyed Retorts”? They must have been listed right after, “MMMWaahHaaHaaHaaHaa!!!”

BEAUTY AND THE BEAST? Shortly after Sue defers to her “woman’s intuition” (mentioned so often, one has to wonder if Stan actually counts it among the list of Sue’s “superpowers”), she decides to try a little tenderness with the monster…and it almost works! Ultimately, I was disappointed that the day wasn’t won by Sue lulling the Dragon Man to sleep with a gentle lullaby.

GET TO THE POINT. On the very busy splash, Stan tells us they can’t waste any more time on introductions since “we’ve got a lot of story to tell!” This is immediately followed by five or six pages of mostly nonsense, including Reed and Thing playing football, signing autographs, superhero cameos, and a running joke about high school Johnny pouting because the college co-eds aren’t interested in him. Now, don’t get me wrong, I love all that color, but please don’t preface it by saying “we’ve got a lot of story to tell!”

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DAREDEVIL #6

“Trapped by the Fellowship of Fear!”
Script: Stan Lee
Art: Wally Wood
Letters: Sam Rosen

IN A NUTSHELL
Aided by henchmen Ox and the Eel, new villain Mr. Fear shoots Daredevil with a fear pellet, causing DD to panic and run away. The next night Daredevil tracks down the villains and battles them, but in the course of the fight, Foggy is injured. Later, while Karen watches over Foggy in the hospital, Daredevil waits outside. When the villains arrive to kill Foggy, Daredevil attacks, chasing them back to the museum. Daredevil uses a fan to blow the fear gas away, and defeats the villains. Back at the hospital, Foggy recovers, while Karen scolds Matt for not looking after his partner.

WHAT’S HOT
WELCOME TO THE FUTURE! Murdock has a tiny television on his office desk. For 1965, that is either very high tech, or very high class!

IS THAT AN ARRHYTHMIA IN YOUR CHEST OR ARE YOU JUST GLAD TO SEE ME? Murdock is such a romantic (or such a chauvinist?) that the only reason he can find for the quickening of a woman’s pulse is that she is near someone she loves. It never occurs to him that she may have just been running to catch a bus, or had one too many cups of coffee that morning. But then, with all his superpowers, he would probably smell sweat or coffee, and from there, deduce correctly. But in the absence of sweat or coffee, it can only mean one thing: love! (I wonder what he deduces when a man’s pulse rate is high and he hasn’t been running or drinking coffee, or trying to stave off turning into the Incredible Hulk?)

PSA. Foggy’s doctor makes a point of saying that he has a very good chance of survival, since there is “no excessive trace of alcohol or tobacco in his blood.” Obviously, Foggy’s policy is to JUST SAY NO. Still, I’m confused by the word “excessive.” Are the Marvel writers advising their young readers that a little drinking and smoking is okay?

SLIMY SOUND EFFECTS. When Daredevil finally gets his chance to wallop the oily Eel, the sound effects are appropriately askew: Klop! Skak! Wup! Thwip! I’m guessing we won’t see these made-up words again…until the next time someone has to tangle with the slippery Eel!

WHAT’S NOT
MEN COMMUNICATING BADLY. On the middle of page nine, both Foggy and Matt are secretly making plans to return that evening to ferret out the criminals, but they don’t share their plans with each other. Matt obviously cannot tell Foggy he is Daredevil, and Foggy probably feels it would be too dangerous to invite his blind buddy to tag along. So, I know there are actually very good reasons for the two of them not communicating with each other, but the image of their nearly identical thought bubbles right next to each other smacks not only of irony, but also the well-known cliché that men are not master communicators.

WAIT, LET ME GRAB MY PURSE! When Karen hears that Foggy is in the hospital, she rushes right over there, in only ten minutes. I surmise she must live extremely close to Municipal Hospital, because within those ten minutes she had time to completely change her outfit, grab a fancy purse, don high heels, and even put on gloves! Who bothers to put on gloves when rushing to the hospital?

YOU HAD ONE JOB…When the Fellowship of Fear breaks in to kill Foggy, it turns out Mr. Fear has forgotten to bring along his Fear Gun. Without it, he’s not Mr. Fear, he’s just a mad scientist with no test tubes. What good is he?

MY NAME IS “FEAR” BUT YOU CAN CALL ME “MR.” Why does Zolton Drago call his costumed alter-ego MR. Fear? Why not Dr. Fear, or Captain Fear, or Commander Fear? Mr. Fear just sounds so…not fearful.

I WONDER
When Daredevil first hears “Mr. Fear,” his thought bubble reads, “Mr. FEAR??” but we don’t see his expression, so there are no clues what he is thinking at that moment. It appears he says it just before Mr. Fear fires the pellet at him, so I’m discounting that he is already under the influence of the fear gas. My guesses are that he’s thinking, “I’ve never heard of this guy! Who could he be?” or “What a stupid name!” or “What a GREAT name! Wish I had thought of that!”

WHERE DO WE GO FROM HERE? So. There is a Fear Potion in the Marvel Universe. What a powerful weapon in the right or wrong hands! Or…are we simply going to forget it exists?

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AVENGERS #13

“The Castle of Count Nefaria!”
Script: Stan Lee
Pencils: Don Heck
Inks: Dick Ayers
Letters: Artie Simek

IN A NUTSHELL
Count Nefaria, leader of the Maggia crime cartel, is angered by disruptions caused by the Avengers, so he arranges a trap. While they stay at his castle as guests, Nefaria captures the teen brigade, then sends duplicates of the Avengers to declare war on America. When the real Avengers depart the castle, the military attacks them. The Avengers deduce that Nefaria is up to something nefarious, and return to the castle to defeat him. However, during the melee, Wasp is gravely injured by a bullet.

WHAT’S HOT
HECK YEAH! On the splash I discover that the “Somewhat Distinctive Art” is done by Don Heck, and right away, I’m thinking, Heck yeah! One of my favorite artists so far. At least the women will not look hideous.

TECHNOLOGY MARCHES ON. Nefaria has a holographic zoom meeting with the American crime lord, then later uses his 3D printer to make lifelike images of the Avengers. All this, and it’s still only 1965!

DUNGEON MASTER. You know Nefaria is a super-villain, not only because of his nefarious name, but also because his castle contains so many dungeons they are labeled A through at least K. This guy is not kidding around.

WHAT’S NOT
BEDPAN DUTY. As the story opens, our mighty warrior superheroes, are catching fur thieves. Really? Where are the police? Or, at the very least…Spider-Man should be taking care of this!

MAGGIA. The world-wide crime cartel is MAGGIA, apparently a takeoff on the MAFIA. But nowadays, I’m thinking…just remove that extra G and I in the middle and what do you have? Just saying…

CHRONOLOGY ISSUES. How much time passes during this story? Right in the middle, we have to stop for Count Nefaria to disassemble his European castle, load it on to a fleet of cargo ships so it can make a transatlantic trip before being rebuilt on the other side. At one point “a matter of weeks” is mentioned, but surely an enterprise this complicated would be more time-consuming than that! And the real question: while all this castle-moving is going on, what else is happening? I don’t imagine the Avengers sitting around twiddling their thumbs as they wait for the Count to set up his new domicile.

CAREFUL WHAT YOU WISH FOR. Wasp is excited to meet Count Nefaria because he is rumored to be “positively fascinating.” This girl seriously needs to upgrade her standards!

WHEN SOMEONE TELLS YOU WHO THEY ARE, BELIEVE THEM. Before Wasp got herself all in a tizzy, she should have taken a hint from the Count’s unfortunate moniker: Count Nefaria. Does she not know what “nefarious” means? Apparently Thor does, since in this very story he uses the phrase “nefarious purposes.” Does no one even suspect that someone named “Count Nefaria” might not be such a great guy?

LOOSE THREADS. Nefaria thinks he’s pretty clever, and in fact his plan is not half bad, but… why didn’t he have a better strategy for dealing with the meddling Teen Brigade? Throw them in the dungeon! Really? Is that all you got, Nefaria? Sure, call them “dumb American kids.” So what? Seems those dumb American kids will be the end of you! So! Take that!!

WOMEN’S INTUITION. Iron Man says he thinks the Count has something to do with their recent trouble. Wasp says, “Call it Women’s Intuition if you want, but I feel the same way.” Sweetheart, no one is going to call it Women’s Intuition when Iron Man said it first.

ARTIFICIAL CLIFFHANGER. In the last panel we discover Wasp has been hit by a stray bullet and is now unconscious, clinging to life. Not only did this action take place off-screen, but it’s also described as “a one-in-a-million chance.” Stan’s not playing fair with his readers, as he tries too hard to make this a two-part story.

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Posted in Avengers, Captain America, Daredevil, Doctor Strange, Fantastic Four, Human Torch, Iron Man, Meanwhile, Sgt. Fury, Strange Tales, Tales of Suspense, Tales to Astonish, Thor | Leave a comment

AMAZING SPIDER-MAN #21: Why Must I Be a Teenager In Love?

Published: February, 1965

Published: February, 1965

“Where Flies the Beetle…!”
Script: Stan Lee
Art: Steve Ditko
Letters: Sam Rosen

Okay, let’s get the boring stuff out of the way, so we can quickly dig deeper into what’s really happening in this story. The Beetle is released from prison and plots revenge on Torch by kidnapping his girlfriend, Doris Evans. Somehow (don’t ask…) Spider-Man gets involved in this whole thing, and there’s this whole thing where Torch and Spidey fight the Beetle, and sometimes each other, but in the end, all is well.

Which is fine, I suppose, but nowhere near as interesting as the many questions raised about the two teenage couples having to endure this fiasco.

DORIS LOVES JOHNNY…OR DOES SHE?
Johnny and Doris are most prominently featured, and the whole time I’m watching them, all I can think is, “What does Johnny see in her?” Sure, she’s shapely, and her facial features are no less attractive than any of the other female characters in these early Marvel Comics (which is not actually saying much, unfortunately…), but Doris is the most domineering and disagreeable girlfriend any guy could have the misfortune to hook up with—never mind a superhero guy, who deserves much better than this.

The oddest thing about this pairing is that Johnny IS the superhero that Doris so strongly objects to! She’s extremely self-centered, more concerned about whether or not she and Johnny can get to dessert in a restaurant than she is about the poor crime victims who need the Torch’s assistance. If she had her way, Johnny would never be Torch again. Is it a bridge too far to say on some level, Doris despises who Johnny is, at his core?

Then, explain this to me: Because Johnny is one of the rare PUBLIC superheroes, Doris knew what she was getting, when she started going out with him. This information wasn’t sprung on her AFTER she was hopelessly hooked on his good looks and charm. Sometimes, girl, honestly, you get what you pay for.

So what DOES Doris see in Johnny? Good looks and charm, apparently, and I’m guessing as a superhero, he’s quite popular in high school. Is Doris really just about going out with the captain of the football team? That’s my sorry opinion of her, that she is the most shallow teenage girl you could ever meet.

Obviously, I am NOT on Team Doris. Never liked her, and after reading this story, like her even less. (Which, by the way, isn’t it odd that we find out so much about the Johnny/Doris relationship in a Spider-Man tale, rather than a Fantastic Four or Torch story?)

Ultimately, the best part of this story is seeing Johnny pooh-pooh Doris’ call for help. She deserves this ridiculing. And in the end, Johnny teases her with, “You don’t mind me being the Human Torch at all…when you’re in trouble!” But will this experience change her view of superheroes? I would guess…NOT.

JOHNNY LOVES DORIS…I THINK…
On the other side of this equation, inexplicably, with all the mixed messages Doris is sending Johnny, at one point, he says, “She sure is a great gal, even if she DOES have that nutty prejudice against costumed crime-fighters!” Sorry, I beg to differ. I haven’t seen anything about Doris that makes me suspect that she is a “great girl.” And I don’t understand why he isn’t more disturbed by her “nutty prejudice” against the one quality that most defines him.

Because Torch is so much a part of who Johnny is. He revels in his do-gooding, as much as he revels in his Torchy showmanship. Well…okay. Johnny probably enjoys showing off more than the average superhero. And he can impress everyone on the street below…except the one girl he’s going steady with. Why doesn’t that eat him up?? Is HE shallow too?? Merely enthralled by her well-drawn figure and Kirby-esque facial features? Oh, tell me it isn’t so!

DORIS LOVES THE PETER PARKER…OF HER IMAGINATION
But let’s move on.

By an extreme coincidence, Doris happens to meet Peter Parker, whom she instantly labels a “nice, sweet, gentlemanly boy!” After a few minutes conversation she is further impressed that he is “so quiet, so soft-spoken, so gentlemanly!” (Yes, she says “gentlemanly” again.) Science major, cultured, down-to-earth…everything Johnny Storm is NOT.

So, is Doris thinking she would much rather have a boyfriend like gentlemanly Peter Parker, rather than wild and crazy Johnny Storm? If that’s what she’s really thinking, then…do it, girl! Cut Johnny free! Let him get on with his life, without having to put up with your demeaning insults and demands.

Of course, when I stop to think about it…Doris doesn’t really want a boyfriend like the character she perceives Peter Parker to be. No, Doris and Johnny are too much alike, and maybe that’s why they stick together. They are both strong-willed personalities, vivacious, confident, energetic. In some weird way, they thrive on the drama and tension inherent in their relationship. Otherwise, why would they still be together?

BETTY LOVES PETER, BUT FEELS UNWORTHY
But let’s leave Johnny and Doris for a while and take a look at Betty and Peter. Oh, poor Betty. Every time I see her, the girl is practically in tears, thinking Peter is cheating on her. Unlike Doris, Betty has absolutely NO self-confidence. But she does have an extremely active imagination. She can take a circus ticket, or a piece of idle gossip heard on the street and turn it into confirming evidence that Peter doesn’t love her, he never loved her, and he’s going to dump her. Any minute now.

A few issues back, Betty started going out with a fellow named Ned. Before you could say “Amazing Spider-Man,” Ned was flying off to Europe, so now he’s out of the picture. But Betty never loved Ned. The strongest emotion she ever felt regarding Ned was disappointment over the fact that Peter did not appear at all jealous that she was dating him.

Obviously Betty loves Peter. But not in a good, healthy way. No, it’s in the sit-by-the-phone-and-cry-until-he-calls way. I would love to know Betty’s background, what has made her so insecure.

PETER LIKES BETTY, BUT THE BOY HAS A LOT ON HIS PLATE
And Peter likes Betty. I think it might be a bridge too far to say he “loves” her, but he cares about her, and wants her to be happy, wants them to be happy together…but that’s difficult, when Betty keeps flying off in fits of tears every other issue. Peter must be thinking, “Women! I’ll never understand them!”

But then, there’s a lot Peter doesn’t understand. Why is it that everyone loves Torch, but runs away when Spider-Man shows up? Why is his boss J. Jonah Jameson always yelling at him? Girl trouble, money trouble, school trouble, bully trouble! No matter where he looks…trouble! Between Peter and Betty, it’s hard to know who has more distressing issues.

LOVE IS A MANY TANGLED THING
So, let’s recap:

  • Doris and Johnny are a hot mess. Betty is a hot mess. And Peter’s entire life is a hot mess.
  • Peter and Johnny are as opposite each other as Betty and Doris are opposite each other. And when you put them all together, the couples they form are equally opposite each other!
  • Johnny and Doris are perhaps too much alike…but is that really working out for them? And Peter and Betty might have a chance at success…with professional counseling. Or at least a good self-help book.

Oh, what a web of interpersonal relationships are woven in this installment of Amazing Spider-Man! The angst! The tears! The bitter resentments and foolish games!

Makes me glad I’m not a teenager anymore.

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TALES TO ASTONISH #64: Love Is a Many Splintered Thing

Published: February, 1965

Published: February, 1965

“When Attuma Strikes!”
Script: Leon Lazarus
Pencils: Carl Burgos
Inks: Paul Reinman
Letters: Sam Rosen

Remember that famous scene from the 1985 Arnold Schwarzenegger movie Commando, when Rae Dawn Chong gets out of the way of the two battling hulks, exclaiming “I can’t believe this macho bullshit!”? At the time, that line resonated for me, and even now, I have to admit, sometimes while reading Marvel Comics, I fast forward through the superhero battles. (“Fighting ensued…macho bullshit…ho-hum…”)

Honestly, I’m mostly here for the Soap Opera.

But when I sat down to read this month’s Giant-Man, simply looking for some easy “Hot” and “Not” comments for a Meanwhile post, I soon found myself unable to proceed, because the Hank/Jan relationship was reaching deep down into my psyche and churning up such uncomfortable feelings. Maybe a little more soap opera than I had originally bargained for.

AS YOUR WORLD BURNS
You see, I haven’t always been married to Russ. In a previous life, I was married to someone who, though not physically abusive, could probably have been described as at least borderline emotionally abusive. With him, I always felt I had to justify my existence. I don’t really care to rehash all the details, but I will mention that at one time I kept a list of the ten most hurtful things he had ever said to me, and though most of them have thankfully faded from memory, for some reason these two still ring clear as a bell: as a stay-at-home mom, I was sometimes told, “Housework! It’s so damn easy,” and when the kids got older and I began looking for a job, I was told, “No one will ever hire you.” So. Emotionally abusive…or not? You decide.

And now, here I am, reading this month’s Giant-Man, and Hank is pretty much treating Jan like total crap. I have to admit that at first I was not really that disturbed by his over-reaction to Jan dropping the test tubes. Sure, he yells at her, but I understand. He’s frustrated about having to backtrack in his all-important, all-consuming experiment. It’s a gut reaction, a natural reaction.

But after his outburst, he immediately goes right back to work, completely ignoring Jan. And again, I give him the benefit of the doubt, thinking, “Okay, yeah, he’s being a jerk, but…his work…the experiment…” For reasons I don’t completely understand, I’m still giving him a pass. And not feeling comfortable with myself about that.

CRY ’N’ HOPE
But then we come to Jan’s reaction, and now… KA-BOOM! The poor girl is reduced to tears, packing her bags. Really?? I had no idea it was this bad! But then I began to think: she’s been hankering after Hank since issue #44, and he occasionally throws her a bone, gives her a small small sign that he might feel the same way, but overall he’s hardly Mr. Romance. So hot and cold. I don’t blame Jan for wondering if this is really going to work out.

But then she says, “I love him,” and now my stomach is churning, and I have to wonder WHY in the world does she love this jerk, who cares more about his lab equipment than he cares about her?

We see this sometimes in books, movies, TV shows…and yes, even comics. (Remember poor Dorrie, so willing to accommodate herself to Johnny’s temper?) When this sort of thing happens in literature and entertainment, it’s good for storytelling, good for drama. But too often, we see it in real life. And I have no patience or understanding—in literature, entertainment, or real life—for the woman who permits herself to be emotionally abused.

And then I remember…once upon a time, that woman was ME. So it makes me wonder if that’s why I have so little patience for it. When I look back at the person I was all those years ago, I have to wonder, why did I allow myself to be treated that way?

ALL FOR MY CHILDREN
My situation, though, was significantly different from Jan’s. First, I was married, there was a legal bond; Hank and Jan have nothing like that. Also, while Jan may have the social mores of the 1960’s telling her to “stand by her man,” for me, the 1990’s were a lot more liberal. But the church I was attending at the time was anything but; divorce, under almost any circumstance, was a big no-no. I’d made a commitment, and I was determined to see it through.

But it was more than that. Not only was I was married, but I also had two kids—and no huge pile of money (as Jan does…she’s an heiress, remember) if I ever should think about wanting to escape. There was no practical way to get out of this, even if I wanted to—and in my first husband’s defense, he was a really good dad to the kids. Basically, if I cared about my kids (which I did), I was stuck. At least for the time being.

But getting back to our story, while I’m applauding Jan’s decision to leave, to no longer allow herself to be treated so shabbily, at the same time I’m faulting her for still loving the man who treats her so shabbily.

But she does indeed leave Hank, and it’s only when she’s gone that he emerges from his scientific fugue and finally realizes what a dick he’s been. (Well… “I guess I have been pretty hard on her lately” will have to suffice for his moment of self-revelation).

LOVE OF FIGHT
In between all this soap opera there’s some predictable comic book action between Giant-Man and Attuma (“Macho bullshit,” anyone??)—but it’s totally incidental, because the real story is that Hank and Jan finally get back together, and hopefully, he won’t take her for granted, in the future.

Human nature being what it is, though, I’m hardly confident this one incident will be the last of its kind for Hank and Jan. I don’t know what lies in store for them—and please don’t spoil me—but I suspect that, due to their superhero obligations, they will remain together a long time. And because of the Marvel Cinematic Universe, I also feel pretty sure that they will eventually marry and have a daughter named Hope, who will also become a superhero. At least that’s what will happen if I can believe the happy ending I see in the movies.

THE GRASS IS GREENER
My own story also has a happy ending. Once the kids got older and began middle school, I went back to work. (See! Somebody did hire me!) I started making a decent salary, and more to the point, I got to where I could support myself and the kids, if I had to.

And eventually I had to. Because, like the superhero whose nobility (or church affiliation) does not allow them to actually kill the super-villain, I was provided an “out.” In the same way that some strange plot twist, or another character, or simply “Fate” steps in at exactly the right moment, in the end, it was my husband’s decision to leave the marriage, thereby absolving me of any religious guilt or wrong-doing in the matter.

These days I’m much more liberal. The kids are grown and doing fine. Russ and I found each other, and I’m much too busy being happy to waste precious emotional energy pondering the plights of my past. Until a comic book story like this comes along to uncomfortably remind me of what has been, and make me thank God for where I am now. As C.S. Lewis, one of my favorite authors, titled one of his books, I have been Surprised by Joy.


“The Horde of Humanoids!”
Script: Stan Lee
Pencils: Steve Ditko
Inks: George Bell
Letters: Artie Simek

EDGE OF PLIGHT
Which leads me to the next story in this issue. Advancing into the next chapter of the Banner/Hulk continuing saga, I was greatly surprised by three particular plights detailed in these pages.

First, to get Banner out of his difficult situation, Rick Jones boldly visits the President of the United States to appeal for help. I kid you not! We never see the President’s face, but every indication is that it’s LBJ, and that Jones shares Banner’s entire story with him! Really! How outrageous is that? So now, the President of the United States is in on the big secret known only to Banner himself and teenage sidekick Rick Jones (who, by the way, if I was casting this story in the early 1990’s, I think I probably would have tried to get Luke Perry to play Rick Jones. What do you think?)

But apparently Rick’s clever scheme actually works! The president stretches his presidential muscles, and charges against Bruce Banner are dropped. Whew! That was easy!

But that’s not all! You know Hulk cannot be kept at bay for long, and a good deal of newsprint is given over to the giant angry green one fighting a horde of pink plastic humanoids, who cannot die, or suffer injury, so…how in the world shall we ever get out of this? The writers realized they were painting themselves into a corner, because on the last page, they once again pull out the preposterous bit of logic that when Hulk’s pulse rate goes too high, he is in danger of changing back into Banner. Which of course makes no sense at all. So I’m surprised that we’re once again seeing this bit of nonsense. It reeks of literary desperation.

DAYS OF OUR LIES
But here’s one more surprise, which reeks of hyperbole on overdrive, as I’ve never seen it before. On the splash for this Hulk story, the editor informs us that this title is “the only super-hero soap opera in all of comicdom!”

HELLO! Haven’t I just gone on, for over a thousand words, commiserating how the relationship between Hank Pym and poor little heiress Janet van Dyne stirs up too many difficult memories of my own unhappy first marriage? If that’s not soap opera, what is?? I mean, we all know that though the Hulk title does on occasion veer into soap opera, it is by no means the most soap operatic, never mind the ONLY super-hero soap opera.

So why do the writers feel compelled to make such an outlandish statement that can instantly be challenged and disproven? It’s almost like they don’t care what they write, as long as it appears larger-than-life, and evokes strong emotions in their audience.

But then…isn’t that exactly the essence of soap opera?

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Marvel Day 2020

Woke up this morning and Russ informed me that today is “Marvel Day.” To which I replied…” Isn’t every day Marvel Day?” He explained it has something to do with the number 616, that the Marvel Universe is Universe #616 (or something like that…). I don’t know, because at this point I’m just beginning to read comics from 1965, so I haven’t gotten to that yet. But it got me thinking…

What is the best way to celebrate Marvel Day? I’m on board! With Coronavirus, economic distress and social unrest, 2020 is not shaping up to be My Favorite Year, so why not grab opportunities to celebrate the little things? We have decided to watch Captain Marvel tonight. Of course we saw it in the theater when it came out, but have not yet opened our 4K disc from Amazon. This is as good a time as any to do that!

And here’s one more way to celebrate: I’ve decided this is the perfect time to do a brief pictoral review of what I consider to be the high points of my own personal experience with Marvel Comics. You may not agree that all of these are high points IN Marvel Comics, but these are MY high points. And on this momentous occasion of Marvel Day 2020, I wish to document them.

And so, let us begin…

X-MEN 2000: OH! SO THIS IS WHAT COMIC BOOKS ARE ALL ABOUT!

As a kid, (especially a girl kid), I didn’t read comics. I didn’t really know what went on in them beyond Superman, Batman, Spider-Man, etc. I had never even heard of Iron Man, and only had the vaguest notion what “the X-Men” was. But when my teenage kids encouraged me to take them to see the 2000 movie, that busted the world of comics wide open for me!

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FANTASTIC FOUR #1 – WHERE IT ALL BEGAN

After that, I probably saw a few more X-Men movies, and some Fantastic Four and Spider-Man, before meeting Russ and being brought further into the world of comics. After being married to Russ for a few years, I decide, “I guess I should read a few comics…just so I can talk about some of this stuff with him.” Of course, he started me off where all good chronologists start off: at the beginning! I read Fantastic Four #1….and away we go!

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I FALL IN LOVE WITH ANT-MAN AND WASP

The first Ant-Man I read was in black-and-white, and I wasn’t expecting to enjoy a story about how a man gets really really small (Steve Martin, anyone?) and saves the day. It seemed so comical. But a few issues in, I meet the feisty Wasp, and I’m surprised how much I’m enjoying the relationship between Janet van Dyne and egghead scientist Hank Pym. And of course, they are not the only Marvel couple whose story I follow with great interest. But this was my first real sense of how much soap opera I could be getting myself into.

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FANTASTIC FOUR #10: A PEEK BEHIND THE CURTAIN

As far back as I can remember, I have always been a fan of “breaking the fourth wall.” In Fantastic Four #10, Stan and Jack take the bold step of including themselves as characters in their own comic. What a hoot!

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AMAZING SPIDER-MAN ANNUAL #1: CROSS-POLLINATION

The cover of Amazing Spider-Man Annual #1 promises that its 72 pages will be “jam-packed with special SURPRISE features” and it is. I was overwhelmed by all the content, but especially by the numerous guest appearances by virtually every Marvel superhero, and also a slew of villains. I realized that when the content you’re creating all comes from the same place (your own imagination), you can basically do whatever you want. No need to haggle with other studios to get a guest appearance, simply draw them in! This book, along with the self-deprecating scenes of the creators in Fantastic Four #10 really opened up for me the concept of just how creative comics can really be.

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IRON MAN 1 – ADVENT OF THE MARVEL CINEMATIC UNIVERSE

When the first Iron Man movie came out, I still didn’t know who the heck Iron Man was…but by the end of the movie…I KNEW. I loved Robert Downey Jr. as Tony Stark coming to the microphone and announcing, “I AM Iron Man.” Kaboom! Couldn’t wait for more!

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NICK FURY AFTER-CREDIT SCENE

Also at the end of Iron Man, in what will quickly become the much-anticipated after-credits scene, here comes Samuel L. Jackson as some guy with an eye patch saying, “I’m here to talk to you about the Avenger Initiative.” KABOOM again!

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GUARDIANS: NOW IT’S OFFICIALLY A UNIVERSE

I didn’t know anything about the Guardians of the Galaxy prior to seeing the TV ads for the upcoming movie, but that was all it took for me to get hooked. To this day, this is one of my favorite arms of the Marvel Universe, probably because of the fantastic use of both humor and music.

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T’CHALLA’S SPEECH

Culturally speaking, I am not generally a fan of “black movies” so going into Black Panther in February 2018 I was not expecting to be blown away. But I was. There have been several times that Marvel movies have brought tears to my eyes, and T’Challa’s speech at the end had me searching for my Kleenex and wishing Wakanda was a real place.

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INDUBITABLY, MY DEAR DR. STRANGE

If there’s one thing Marvel Studios does well—and obviously there’s a lot more than one thing they do well—but they almost always get the casting spot on. Russ and I often speculate which actor or actress would best portray a particular Marvel character, and are always delighted when Marvel takes our advice, or comes up with someone even better. I remember the moment Russ first told me the news that Benedict Cumberbatch (a favorite from the Sherlock series) had been pegged for Dr. Strange. Glee! And he did not disappoint.

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GOOSE

I am of course a “Cat Person,” so seeing Nick Fury interact with Goose in Captain Marvel was so much fun. However, I was NOT prepared for Goose’s….shall we call them…exceptional abilities…

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WATCH THIS, STAN!

Love ALL the Stan Lee cameos, but this one sort of blew the lid off all the rest of them. What in tarnation is going on here? The debate continues…

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AGENTS OF S.H.I.E.L.D.

Another “can’t wait for it” moment came when we first heard that Marvel was doing a weekly TV show. Russ and I have religiously watched each season of Marvel’s Agents of SHIELD, and some seasons, frankly, have been better than others. In my opinion, they are going out with a bang in the seventh season, which so far has been fun and creative beyond anything we’ve seen before from the show.

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PEGGY CARTER AND JARVIS

Early on in the SHIELD TV run, we were treated to another blast from the past with Agent Carter. I guess I’m a sucker for period pieces, because I absolutely adored the two short seasons. Peggy’s so sassy in a red hat, but most of all I’m in love with Jarvis. (Who wouldn’t be?)

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AVENGERS: ENDGAME OPENING CREDITS


Okay, here I go, crying again. After seeing so many beloved characters dissolve before my very eyes in Avengers: Infinity War, I was more than ready for Marvel to set right this egregious event. Endgame begins with a song over the opening Marvel logo, Dear Mr. Fantasy by Traffic, and the lyrics are: “Dear Mr. Fantasy, play us a tune, something to make us all happy. Do anything, take us out of this gloom.” That was all I needed to hear. In April 2019, I was sorely in need of something to take me out of my gloom. Even if it only was a fantasy.

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AVENGERS ASSEMBLE

I’m throwing this one in mostly for Russ. Almost since the moment we first realized, during the Nick Fury after-credits scene of Iron Man, that The Avengers on the big screen was actually going to happen, he has been waiting to hear Captain America say “Avengers Assemble.” And he finally got his wish in Endgame. What an emotional roller coaster of a movie! Some emotions we would have rather not experienced, but the “Avengers Assemble” moment was what Marvel Comics is all about.

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There is obviously a lot more I could say, but Marvel Day 2020 only lasts 24 hours, so I’ll stop here and also ask if, in the comments below, anyone else wants to share what they consider to be their own personal high points in the Marvel Universe.

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