Meanwhile…: April, 1964

STRANGE TALES #119

cover_st119“The Torch Goes Wild!”
Script: Stan Lee
Art: Dick Ayers
Letters: Sam Rosen

IN A NUTSHELL
After an undercover Commie spy, the Rabble Rouser, convinces authorities to ban Torch from using his powers, he kidnaps visiting ally, Prince Nagamo. Torch is powerless to help, until the mayor gives him permission to flame on again. When Torch is weakened in the battle, the Rabble Rouser takes him prisoner as well, but with the help of Prince Nagamo, Johnny gains control of the Mesmerizer Wand. He turns it on the Rabble Rouser, then destroys it. Torch regains the respect of the city, and Doris decides to date him again.

WHAT’S HOT
BEEN THERE, BUDDY. Spider-Man, no stranger to destructive PR, drops by to help Johnny deal with his hardships. These two have had their differences in the past, so it’s nice to see the empathic side of your friendly neighborhood Spider-Man.

st119apologyAPOLOGY…ACCEPTED. Johnny is such a good boy, after his initial outburst defying the new order against his powers, he’s repentant, and takes extreme pains to comply. Here he looks so cute and entirely apologetic for lighting a bystander’s cigarette.

WHAT’S NOT
SELECTION. Why is the Rabble Rouser picking on Torch, and not anyone else?

EXCLUSION. Reed, Sue and Thing take a vacation and don’t invite Johnny, because he has to be in school. This is not the first time they’ve left him out, using school as an excuse. If I were Johnny, I’d also be annoyed.

HYPE. On the splash, the Rabble Rouser is touted as “a really different super-villain.” But with his “powerful voice and a talented tongue” and will-sapping wand, is he really very much different than the Voice (Tales to Astonish #42) or the Hate-Monger (Fantastic Four #21)?

TOGETHER FOREVER? In a desperate attempt for a completely happy ending, Doris gets back together with Johnny, but her explanation is unsettling: “I only dated that other boy to make you JEALOUS! But now that I see what a TEMPER you have, I’ll never do it again!” Okay, I know that kind of thinking may have gone over less like a lead balloon fifty years ago, but it’s still hard to imagine any reasonable person saying something like that.

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st119thumb“Beyond the Purple Veil!”
Script: Stan Lee
Art: Steve Ditko
Letters: Art Simek

IN A NUTSHELL
When two petty thieves steal a jewel from Dr. Strange, it transports them to the Purple Dimension. Strange follows and offers himself in exchange for their freedom. Evil ruler Aggamon agrees, but when he and Strange pit mystical forces against each other. In a battle of wills, Aggamon’s demolisher challenges the power of Dr. Strange’s amulet. Aggamon eventually surrenders, allowing Strange to return to his own dimension. The thieves turn themselves in to police and vow to go straight.

WHAT’S HOT
I recently wrote about Journey Into Mystery #102, in which Thor offers himself up to Death in exchange for Sif’s release. Here we see Dr. Strange as the sacrificial hero, who buys freedom for others with his good deed. And the side benefit? Impressed with Dr. Strange’s act of kindness, the criminals are “put upon the right path.” As I mentioned before, a mythic story so compelling, it keeps getting told, over and over again.

WHAT’S NOT
ADT. With all the mystical powers of the dark arts at his command, Dr. Strange can’t conjure up some simple anti-burglary spell on his apartment? Even worse, after he’s burglarized once, he doesn’t bother to take measures to protect himself, even knowing he has a dangerous gem in his possession??

WILD! That Strange is one swingin’ fella! He gives the hired help the night off, so he can do anything he wants…and opts for spending “the rest of the evening in solitude, meditation and studying my ritualistic incantations.”

PURPLE. Was it wrong of me, after learning that Strange was about to travel to the “Purple Dimension,” to expect the following pages to contain scenes that were perhaps, a little more…purple?

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AMAZING SPIDER-MAN #11

cover_asm11“Turning Point”
Script: Stan Lee
Art: Steve Ditko
Letters: Sam Rosen

IN A NUTSHELL
To help her brother, who owes money to jailed gangster “Blackie,” Betty Brant drives Doctor Octopus to Philadelphia when he is released from jail. Blackie promises to forgive the debt when Doc Ock breaks him out of prison, but once released, Blackie kidnaps Betty and her brother. The criminals meet on a boat, and Spider-Man breaks in on the party. Fighting ensues, Betty’s brother is shot, and Octopus escapes. Betty blames Spider-Man for her brother’s death, so Peter ditches his plan to reveal his secret identity to her.

WHAT’S HOT
DEATH. Betty’s brother actually DIES. He’s not a “bad guy,” just a poor schlub who’s made some bad decisions. By putting this in the “Hot” column, I’m not saying it’s a good thing he died; I’m just saying that’s pretty intense stuff for a twelve-cent comic book. It’s rare for even the most horrible criminals to actually die; they just run away, and live to fight another day. It’s even more rare for an innocent person to die. Ben Parker was the first, and this month, Jack Murdock. Now, here’s another. No more kid gloves! Anything can happen!

A HOUSE DIVIDED. Whenever you get too many criminals together in one place, it’s a sure bet they’ll turn against each other, making it easy for the good guys to triumph. Even with a sprained ankle, and pages upon pages of fighting scenes, the bad guys turning against each other makes it way too easy for Spidey to win in the end.

WHAT’S NOT
CIVICS. As the story begins, Spidey runs to the jail to try to convince the warden not to release Doc Ock. Peter may be a whiz at math and science, but apparently hasn’t been paying attention in social studies. He how no idea how the American justice system works. Or, can we just put this down to being an impetuous, emotional youth?

CONFUSED MUCH? Betty describes her deceased brother as “always so weak…so headstrong!” Aren’t those two different things? Well, she’s distraught–she probably doesn’t know what she’s saying.

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FANTASTIC FOUR #25

cover_ff25“The Hulk vs. the Thing”
Script: Stan Lee
Pencils: Jack Kirby
Inks: George Bell
Letters: Sam Rosen

IN A NUTSHELL
Thing refuses a serum that might permanently revert him back to Ben. Good thing, since he has work to do! When Hulk comes to New York City, seeking revenge on the Avengers. Mr. Fantastic is incapacitated with a virus, and Hulk quickly defuses Torch and the Invisible Girl, so it falls to Thing to fight the mean, green one. A bus is ripped in half, a building topples, and bridge girders are used as rope—unsuccessfully. After half the city is destroyed, Thing admits he’s been beaten, and Hulk hops away, still seeking the Avengers.

WHAT’S HOT
COLOR. I like the purple sky on the cover. And Hulk is looking exceptionally green here. It’s a vibrant and attractive cover.

RECONCILED. When Reed offers Thing a serum to turn him permanently back to Ben, Thing refuses. He doesn’t want to give up being Thing. The love of a good woman has changed his mind and brought him peace.

ff25panicPANIC. This struck me as funny: “Attention! Attention! This is the Commissioner! Do not panic! Repeat…do not panic! The entire midtown section has been evacuated! The police have the area cordoned off! The Fantastic Four are now being summoned! Do not panic!” Oh really? Judging by the look on this bystander’s face, I’d say it’s time to PANIC.

FREAK. It also struck me as funny when Hulk tells Thing, “Fool!! You are just a muscular FREAK! But I’M the Hulk!” Because “muscular” and “freak” are two words we would never use to describe the Hulk…right?

WHAT’S NOT
THE ULTIMATE ULTIMATE. The splash describes this as “The Battle of the Century.” Okay, if it’s December, 1999. But in 1964, we might want to hold back on the hyperbole.

WHO? Bruce Banner is named as BOB Banner no less than seven times.

I MAY NOT BE A DOCTOR, BUT I PLAY ONE IN MARVEL COMICS… The doctor is useless. He walks in, looks at Reed and says, “There’s nothing I can do for him. He needs rest, here’s a sedative. Pray his fever goes down.” I hope they didn’t have to pay too much for this house call.

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TALES OF SUSPENSE #52

cover_tos52“The Crimson Dynamo Strikes Again!”
Plot: Stan Lee
Script: Don Rico
Art: Don Heck
Letters: Sam Rosen

IN A NUTSHELL
Commie defector Professor Vanko works for Stark Industries, perfecting a deadly laser ray gun. The Russians send the alluring spy, Black Widow, and brutishly strong Boris to destroy him. While Black Widow distracts Tony with her beauty, Boris captures Vanko. Boris dons the Crimson Dynamo suit, and uses its powers to incapacitate Iron Man. But Iron Man recharges, escapes, and rescues Vanko. In an all-out battle with Boris, Vanko sacrifices his life to destroy Boris and prove his loyalty to America. Black Widow escapes.

WHAT’S HOT
FIRST APPEARANCE. This story marks the first appearance of Black Widow. I can see how she’s supposed to be beautiful and alluring, but we have a long way to go in developing the persona we find in the Marvel movies.

ROCKY AND BULLWINKLE. How amusing is it that the Russian villains in this story are named Boris and Natasha? The Slavic spies of the Rocky & Bullwinkle cartoon series had been around for four or five years when Marvel introduced their version of Boris and Natasha. Surely these names were not randomly chosen. As if the anti-Commie sentiments of these early Marvel comics were not already inflated enough, let’s name our bad guys after a couple of bumbling cartoon characters.

NOBILITY, PART I. When Vanko urges Iron Man to finish off Boris, Iron Man replies, “Can’t. We don’t play that way.” How American of him! Kind of reminds me of Captain Kirk.

NOBILITY, PART II. Vanko, the reformed Commie, says, “You think no man would give up his life for an ideal, do you? You are WRONG! I would dare anything for this country…which has been so good to me!” And then he puts his money where his mouth is, and gives his life for his new country.

WHAT’S NOT
A HOAX, A DREAM, AN IMAGINARY STORY. I understand that some comic books at this time (Russ informs me that DC was particularly guilty) might on occasion promise something on the cover that the story inside does not actually deliver. I call this “a cheat.” And this story engages in such deception, with a cover that suggests the formerly reformed Commie scientist Professor Vanko has gone back over to the Dark Side. Of course, that’s not it at all. But I wonder how many dimes and pennies were collected from readers who simply couldn’t believe a defector would defect back to mother Russia.

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tos52thumb“The Failure!”
Plot: Stan Lee
Script: Larry Lieber
Pencils: Larry Lieber
Inks: Paul Reinman
Letters: Sam Rosen

In the accompanying “Tales of The Watcher,” we’re back to that Star Trek idealism again. Three hundred years into the future (at precisely the same time that the crew of the Enterprise is going where no man has gone before) all the evils on earth have been abolished, and everyone is concerned with taking care of business. One oddball, Kenn Bentley (and you can tell how advanced society has become, because it now takes TWO “n’s” to spell “Ken”) rejects materialism and devotes his life to poetry, art, music, literature. He also visits sick people.

Nobody understands or appreciates Kenn except his girlfriend, Val. Nobody, that is…until a mysterious craft descends from outer space and takes him captive. (In her love for Kenn, Val tags along.) The aliens have used their “scientific screening devices” to select the most perfect ruler from among all the countless beings in the universe, and guess what? It’s Kenn! He and Val go on to rule the greatest empire in the cosmos, and the people back on earth never know how successful this “failure” has become.

This was a cute little story, but it brings up a few points:

tos52reignFAR-FETCHED? The story begins with the businessmen of 300 years from now boasting about how much overtime they work and how much they help their company. I know this is supposed to be the future, but this dedication to business and industry reminds me of what I hear is currently the norm in Japanese society.

BUSINESS IS BUSINESS. The narrator informs us that “Naturally, students in such a materialistic society all major in business courses.” But I have to wonder: if everyone goes into business, who goes into service, medicine, education, farming, production, science, etc.? Who dispenses medicine when you’re sick? Who grows the food? Who cuts your hair? Wouldn’t a society where everyone engages in “business” eventually topple under its own weight?

FORGETFULNESS. It seems that 300 years into the future, the entire world civilization has completely forgotten the rich history of all the alien races that visited and attacked earth back in the mid 20th century (Skrulls, Stone Men from Saturn, Toad Men, etc.), because they’ve “scrapped…heavy armaments years ago, when we attained world peace,” leaving the entire planet defenseless against alien attack. How is that good for business?

SHADES OF THE BORG! When the aliens come to earth and demand Kenn Bentley come with them, the narrator says, “Realizing the futility of resistance…” If that line doesn’t make you think of Star Trek, what will?


TALES TO ASTONISH #54

cover_tta54“No Place to Hide!”
Script: Stan Lee
Art: Don Heck
Letters: Art Simek

IN A NUTSHELL
Suspecting voter fraud in Santo Rico, the U.S. Government sends Henry and Jan to spy on newly elected Commie leader, El Toro. They are immediately accosted by El Toro’s men, and Jan is taken prisoner. Hank gets stuck in his Giant-Man persona, and finds it difficult to hide. He feels the sting of El Toro’s powerful horns at every turn, until finally he finds refuge on top of a tall building and contacts the ants to help him locate Wasp. Once he rescues Jan, the two capture El Toro, uncover the voter fraud in his office, and restore democracy.

WHAT’S HOT
CONFUSION. Jan plays coy female games with Henry and confuses him, so the next time she suggests a vacation, he’ll agree before he knows what he’s doing. Oh, that crafty vixen!

STREETWEAR. Spider-Man wears his costume under his clothes, Iron Man carries his gear in an attaché case. But as Pym takes an enlarging capsule, he “races around a nearby building, dropping his outer clothes as he swallows the potent pill.” Is this the first time we address the issue of Hank’s streetwear? I’ve been so wrapped up in the Hank/Jan romantic drama, I haven’t even thought till now to ask the question about streetwear! Of course, in a world with fabrics made of unstable molecules, I guess I just sort of figured the same sort of thing must be going on here as well.

WHAT’S NOT
“OH, NO!!” Early in the story, we have a comedy bit where Jan encourages one of Giant-Man’s fan clubs to visit him. Upon seeing his gushing young admirers, Giant-Man exclaims, “Oh no!! It’s one of my fan clubs!” ONE of my fan clubs? You mean there are more than one? And why “Oh no!!”?? What kind of message does that send to the fans reading this comic? Does Giant-Man not appreciate his fans?

BIG BROTHER. Why do Washington officials send Henry and Jan to spy on a foreign country? Don’t we have actual spies?

YOU KNOW WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU ASSUME. The moment Hank and Jan get off the plane, they’re immediately pegged as “suspicious.” When El Toro hears they are Americans, his first impulse is to assume they’re spies and have them arrested. If American tourists aren’t allowed in this country, why did the U.S. government send them there “as tourists”? Oh wait. Maybe when the government decided to forgo normal-sized spies in lieu of Ant-Man and Wasp, they assumed Ant-Man and Wasp would have enough sense to realize they were chosen for this mission precisely because they could shrink and avoid suspicion. It feels like somebody dropped the ball here.

ONE PILL MAKES YOU BIGGER…When our heroes first arrive in Santo Rico, why does Henry tell Jan she needs to hold all their capsules? He says he wouldn’t want them to be found on him…but it’s okay if Jan is discovered with concealed drugs? Is chivalry dead? Or is this simply a plot device, so when Jan has the opportunity to toss ONE pill to Hank, he must remain as Giant-Man during the greater part of the story?

BIG MAN, LITTLE LADY. So, Pym gives Jan all the capsules to hold in her makeup bag. I suddenly found myself asking…if Hank can get small OR big…why can’t Jan? I know the concept of a “Giant-Woman” is not yet marketable, but if the narrative calls for it, why not?

AY, CARAMBA! A surpised Latino exclaims “Carremba!!!” What is this? Is this like ¡Ay, caramba! Only misspelled? Or is this the true Spanish spelling?

THE OBLIVIOUS GIANT. After being chased all over town by El Toro’s men, Giant-Man takes a moment to catch his breath and exclaim, “Whew! I never suspected that being double-sized could be such a HANDICAP!!” Really? How long has he been doing the Giant-Man thing? Brilliant scientific mind that he is, he never until now, thought to suspect that being twelve feet tall might occasionally be a bit…inconvenient?

TRIAL BY…OH, SCREW IT, JUST KILL HER! They’re not kidding around about Commie injustice! “EL Toro says the girl must be a democratic SPY! She is to be executed.” Not only will there be no trial, we don’t even need a certainty that she’s a spy. She “must” be a spy. Therefore, she’s scheduled for execution.

AGUA-GATE? El Toro keeps the evidence of his crimes in an unlocked drawer in his office. Either he’s incredibly confident no one will dare cross him, or he’s incredibly stupid. In his defense, Watergate is still eight years away, so he may not yet be fully aware of the value of a shredder. And even if he is…does Office Depot deliver to Santo Rico?

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tta54thumb“Conquest!”
Plot: Stan Lee
Script: Larry Lieber
Pencils: Larry Lieber
Inks: Sol Brodsky
Letters: Art Simek

King Shann conquers a defenseless planet, hoping to gain the respect of his subjects, but when his people must work harder to rebuild the vanquished planet, they turn against him.

And the moral of this story is:
If it ain’t broke, don’t break it. Then you won’t have to fix it.


JOURNEY INTO MYSTERY #103

cover_jim 103“The Enchantress and the Executioner!”
Script: Stan Lee
Pencils: Jack Kirby
Inks: Chic Stone
Letters: Sam Rosen

IN A NUTSHELL
Loki convinces Odin that the Enchantress can make Thor forget Jane Foster. When Blake rejects the Enchantress’ advances, she enlists the Executioner, who sends Jane to Limbo. To release Jane, Thor agrees to give the Executioner his hammer. Of course the Executioner can’t lift Mjolnir, and the Enchantress turns him into a tree. Thor retrieves the hammer, then sends the villains back to Asgard. Jane, mad at Blake because she saw him in a compromising position with the Enchantress, tells him she is “waiting for Thor.”

WHAT’S HOT
SOAPY, SUDSY! There’s so much soap opera in this tale, it was such a delight to read! Everyone has their own motives based on a desire for love or power, and each action taken by each character influences another character to make yet another move, which affects yet another character! We could go on like this indefinitely! And why not?

ENCHANTING. This story introduces the beautiful Enchantress, with an uncanny power over the attention spans of both Asgardian and mortal men. Is she called the Enchantress because she is able to use the powers of sorcery to get what she wants, or because she is alluring, beautiful and…well, let’s just say it…enchanting?

SPLIT PERSONALITY? It’s interesting that while Blake and Thor are two completely separate entities, and each thinks of the other as a different person, they share not only memories, but also emotions. And despite the fact that Donald Blake is not an Asgardian superhero, the Enchantress notes that he shares the same “strength of character.”

WHAT’S NOT
OH! IF ONLY… Once again, we see that Jane has some strange notions about relationships. When Blake arrives back in his office, exhausted from time traveling as Thor, Jane puts him to bed and tucks him in, mooning, “If only I could do this for him ALWAYS!” immediately followed by the thought that although she is sure he loves her, for some strange reason, he never suggests marriage.

How Jane gets from tucking-in to marriage all in one word balloon makes me realize she’s still living in an idealized fantasy world. Previously, she daydreamed about ironing Thor’s cape, cutting his hair, polishing his hammer. Now, she longs to mother her poor, dear Don. It’s a good thing Blake isn’t suggesting marriage, because poor, dear Jane is obviously not ready for it.

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jim103thumb“Thor’s Mission to Mirmir!”
Script: Stan Lee
Pencils: Jack Kirby
Inks: Chic Stone
Letters: Art Simek

Thor battles mythical creatures to bring a branch from the tree of life to the kingdom of Mirmir, so the mystic waters can be stirred up and rained upon two trees, which then come to life as, essentially, Adam and Eve.

I was going to start this entry by making a sly quip about the easiest way to create a name for an imaginary place: When you’re out of ideas, simply find a syllable and repeat it (Mirmir). But as I continued reading the story and ran into these names—

Sindri
Skipbladner
Skord
Gullin
Yggdrasill
Midgard
Aske
Embla

—I knew that Stan was NOT out of ideas…or, he was simply repeating an oft-told tale. And sure enough, in the last panel, an Editor’s Note informs us that this story is part of the Norse legends regarding the birth of mankind.

Cool. Real Norse legends, with real Norse names. But cooler still: the Norse have a legend that is so similar to our Judeo-Christian story of Adam and Eve. So similar, in fact, that the names of the first two human beings begin with the letters A and E.

Coincidence…or by design?

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Posted in Doctor Strange, Fantastic Four, Giant-Man, Human Torch, Iron Man, Meanwhile, Spider-Man, Strange Tales, Tales of Suspense, Tales to Astonish, Thor, Wasp | Leave a comment

MARVELOUS MOVIES: FANTASTIC FOUR (2005)

posterffBefore I started reading Marvel Comics, I had a vague notion that somewhere out there in fantasyland existed a group known as the Fantastic Four, but I had no idea what they were like. If you had shown me a picture of Superman, Aquaman, Batman and Wonder Woman and told me this was the Fantastic Four, I would have believed you. I may have even believed you, if you’d shown me Bert and Ernie, Cookie Monster and Big Bird. That’s how ignorant I was. (Well, wait…maybe not that ignorant…)

Then, in 2005, along comes a movie with the superb title of Fantastic Four, and I went to see it. I don’t exactly remember why, but it probably had something to do with Ioan Gruffudd. Some time earlier, I had discovered Mr. Gruffudd when picking up a copy of the A&E Horatio Hornblower series at my local public library. hornblower1I lived in South Florida at the time, and let me go on record as saying that except for NYC, LA and Chicago, Broward County has the best public library system in the county. Don’t believe me? Click here.

kirkI was only interested in Horatio Hornblower because I remembered once reading that William Shatner likened Captain Kirk to the famous Hornblower from literature. And so, in a long and twisting path, once again, all things lead back to Star Trek.

So, here I am, a big Ioan Gruffudd fan, going to see Fantastic Four, having no idea what I’m in for. My handsome Welshman is playing someone named Reed Richards, who is a super-smart guy (I like that!) who also has an amazing ability to stretch. Oh, yeah! That’s right: my kids have a toy rubber figure of some guy in a blue suit who has really long stretchy arms and legs. This must be him.

And there’s another guy who catches fire, a girl who becomes invisible, and someone who looks like he’s made of rocks. So then…THIS is the Fantastic Four.

Huh!

I enjoy the movie, and not just because of Ioan Gruffudd. I like the story, and the villain is creepy, with awesome superpowers of his own. Everyone in the theater claps and cheers when the mailman shows up. I feel like I’m missing something on that one, but no matter. It’s a tale well told, with a happy ending.

stanleeFlash forward ten years. I’m married to Russ, I know the difference between Marvel and DC, and I’m reading Fantastic Four comics. Now I understand why everyone got such a kick out of Willie Lumpkin, the mailman. At this point, I’ve seen almost every Marvel movie, and whenever Stan shows up on screen, I cheer as well.

But, from this vantage point, I look back at Fantastic Four (2005) and realize mistakes were made. While it’s still enjoyable to watch, the movie is flawed in two major ways.

First, let’s consider this little issue of CANON. Again, we have to go back about ten years when, to the best of my knowledge, a cannon is simply a weapon Horatio Hornblower fires from his ship while fighting pirates. But then I start dabbling in fan fiction (see above reference to everything leading back to Star Trek, and while we’re at it, Star Wars…) and now I’ve learned that “canon” qualifies a piece of fiction that absolutely respects the creator’s original intentions. Captain Kirk is from Iowa, not Arizona. Luke and Leia are siblings, not a romantic couple. And Sue Storm is a natural blonde.

But we’ll get to that in a moment.

Let me go on record as saying I am super-big on canon. I love to respect the creator’s original intentions. But, at the same time, having seen many Marvel movies, I realize it’s not always easy, or even advisable, to stick strictly to canon when trying to condense 50 years of comic book history into a two-hour movie. Sometimes the only way you can make sense of it all is by twisting, bending and stretching the truth, so that in the end, you have something that looks less like Reed Richards, and more like Mr. Fantastic. On occasion, a single supporting character may be a compilation of several different characters, and a villain’s backstory takes place in Buffalo, not Bulgaria. But that can be okay. If handled with care.

Case in point: Russ and I have recently become fans of the BBC Sherlock series. For those who may not know, this series follows the famous fictional detective from holmesthe late 19th century, but now he’s been dug up and replanted. No, he hasn’t opened shop in Buffalo, he remains in London, but it’s modern-day London. Mrs. Hudson is still his landlady and Dr. Watson his faithful sidekick. But their arsenal of crime-fighting equipment now includes computers, cell phones, DNA evidence, etc. Holmes remains a thorn in Lestrade’s side, but now he needles the Inspector with text messages, as much as direct verbal assaults.

If you haven’t seen this series, you really need to check it out. It’s a perfect example of how to pluck a creative property out of its comfortable canon and yet remain true to its original spirit.

Which leads me back to Fantastic Four (2005). When I first encountered this movie, knowing nothing about this particular group of superheroes, I was fine with it all. Because I didn’t know any better. But now I do. And now that I do, I take exception to some of the plot points, but even moreso, extreme umbrage at some of the character portrayals.

Before I begin my rant, let’s get this out of the way: Michael Chiklis, as Ben Grimm/Thing was just perfect. So why was it so hard to cast the other three?

REED RICHARDS – STRETCHING THE TRUTH?
toyLet’s start with Reed Richards. As much as I’ve established that I love the actor Ioan Gruffudd, he’s simply not right for this part. And it has nothing to do with his accent. He does an American accent well enough, but no matter how much bleach was added to his temples, he was not old enough to be Reed Richards. I’m new to Marvel comics, but so far my impression of Reed Richards is that he’s the MATURE leader of this group. Though reedpipehe’s not an old man, I want my Reed Richards to have a few more “wrinkles.” Not necessarily actual wrinkles, but he should give the impression of being a little more worn around the edges. And he should smoke a pipe. Offhand, I don’t recall if Ioan Gruffudd picked up a pipe in Fantastic Four, but if he did, my main impression would have been, “Oh look, there’s that hot young Welshman Ioan Gruffudd, trying to appear more mature by smoking a pipe.”

SUE STORM – DRENCHED IN INCONGRUITIES?
But if there’s an incongruity between the movie Richards and the actual Richards, how much more Sue Storm! Now, I like Jessica Alba, nothing wrong with her as an actress, but again, she’s not right for the part. For one thing, Sue Storm is presumably a natural blonde. Jessica Alba is not, and what’s more, she obviously is not. She’s a beautiful, sexy woman (as is Sue Storm) but Jessica Alba is part Hispanic, and Hispanics are not natural blondes. And if you try to make them blonde, it’s not the same kind of blonde as Sue Storm. No matter how much bleach you add to her hair, she’s never going to look like the real Sue Storm. Again, through the whole movie, I’m looking Sue, thinking, “There’s Jessica Alba with bleached hair.”

blondeWe know the real Sue Storm made frequent visits to the salon, but I don’t think coloring was part of her beauty regime. Or, if it was, at least she walked out looking like a natural blonde. Not like Ms. Alba, who looks like “a woman who bleaches her hair.”

Hollywood is awash with talented, blonde actresses. It’s hard to believe none of them were available, at the time the movie was cast.

And what’s all this about Sue having a relationship with Victor Von Doom?? What in the world would ever attract our heroine to the man who morphs into arch-villain Doctor Doom? Sure, the Sue of comics has a crush on Namor, but Namor is a noble villain. He’s the Monarch of Atlantis. Doom is simply mean and bitter. Brilliant, but warped. The real Sue Storm would never go for a guy like that.

JOHNNY–BOY, OH BOY?
And the real Sue Storm has a little brother. Who’s in high school. He’s a basketball player, not a fighter pilot. Ben Grimm is the fighter pilot. Johnny’s just the juvenile tag-along. Until he gets zapped by cosmic rays, then he’s a teenager with explosive powers. Which is more palatable than a grown man with explosive powers who simply ACTS like a teenager.

originRuss pointed out that they probably made Johnny older and a pilot to explain how all of them end up on that rocket that gets bombarded with cosmic rays. If you’ll remember, in the origin story (FF #1), Reed and Ben are the pilots for the flight into outer space, and Sue says, “I’m your fiancée. I’m going with you.” And Reed doesn’t object, so Johnny adds, “Where sis goes, I go.”

Now granted, as much as I love the origin story, this part doesn’t hold together. And it certainly wouldn’t fly (no pun intended) in a movie aimed at any audience past 1965, unless it’s a goofy comedy. So it appears the creators of Fantastic Four (2005) changed the essential make-up of the main characters in order to accommodate their doctored plot.

Not happy about that.

After about five minutes reflection, though, I easily come up with an alternative solution to the problem. Why not keep Johnny a teenager who sees the big boys getting ready to blast off into outer space and says, “Hey! I want to go, too!” No, squirt, you can’t. This is MEN’S work, and besides, you’ve got to take Doris to the prom. Oh…okay…he pouts. But secretly, the ever-resourceful teenager plans to stowaway.

So now, Johnny’s on the rocket, and where’s Sue? Well, it’s okay if she’s a scientist, a professional equal to Reed and Ben, also scheduled for the flight into the cosmic rays. As much as I love canon, it’s always good for Marvel movies to modernize the portrayal of women. Because when you’re going back to these origin stories from the 1960’s, the portrayal of women is so archaic. Nowadays you simply can’t have the gals vacuuming in high heels, while the menfolk head out to save the world.

socialiteBut the Sue Storm we know is a socialite. Socialites existed in the 1960’s, and still do today. So it would be perfectly fine if she wasn’t a scientist. If she’s a socialite, we might see her lunching with the girls, visiting the salon, totally bored with her easy life. In that case, it’s not difficult to imagine that when she discovers brother Johnny has stowed away on the rocket, she follows to bring him back, and also gets stuck in the cosmic rays.

What a story she’ll have to share with her beautician, next time she visits the salon!

For highlights. Not a total dye job.

Why am I harping on this? Why is it so important that the actors in a movie approximate the physical appearance of their comic book counterparts? Why? Maybe the better question is——why not? There are so many actors available for these roles. You don’t need to pick a Reed Richards who is not old enough. You don’t need to pick a Sue Storm who is not a natural blonde. You don’t need to pick a Johnny who looks like he’s ready to join the Marines.

Case in point: the Avengers series. How well cast are these movies? Robert Downey Jr. as Tony Stark. Perfect. Chris Hemsworth as Thor. Hunky. Blonde. Perfect. Those casting agents didn’t dye Downey Jr.’s hair to turn him into Thor. downeyThey didn’t darken Hemsworth’s hair to make him Tony Stark. Tony Stark is an American, and has an American accent, just like Robert Downey Jr. And Hemsworth’s Australian accent plays right into the exotic flavor of his Asgardian character.

Casting an existing property is all about audience expectations. The more you meet those expectations, the less likely the audience will wallow around in, “Oh, look, there’s Actor X trying to be something he really isn’t.”

This movie’s casting agents could have gotten it right. But they didn’t. And when you add sub-standard casting to some major plot mishaps, you get a “series” that only goes on for one more movie. Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer (2007) began strong in theaters, but attendance dropped dramatically in the second and third week. Maybe audiences sensed, once again, that something about all this was… not quite right?

Two films in, and the “series” needs to be rebooted.

A reboot is currently in production. Before researching for this article, I had high hopes that this time, Fox would get it right. However, everything I’ve seen online sesameso far makes me wonder if they’re taking a giant step backwards, as if they didn’t learn from their mistakes the first time around.

We’ll see.

Posted in Movies | 3 Comments

DAREDEVIL #1: Stop Me If You’ve Heard This One Before

Published: April, 1964

Published: April, 1964

“The Origin of Daredevil”
Script: Stan Lee
Art: Bill Everett
Letters: Sam Rosen

Here we have the origin story of Daredevil. This should be something new and exciting…yes? Well, yes… and no. It is exciting to meet a new costumed vigilante, but in many ways, there’s little new about our newest superhero. He seems a conglomeration of all the elements that have gone into our existing superheroes. Yes, he’s a daredevil, but he could have just as easily been named Hero Hash, with a great big H blazoned upon his chest, instead of a D. (Oh, wait! Hasn’t H already been taken by the Hate-Monger?)

Now, don’t get me wrong. I’m not saying I dislike Daredevil, or his backstory, or his little corner of the Marvel Universe. I’m just saying I felt walloped by a giant blast of déjà vu while reading this book.

I almost feel Stan and company are aware that’s what readers are likely to experience, and are purposely drawing parallels. What’s one of the first things we see, in the left corner of the splash? An image of the cover of The Amazing Spider-Man #1, with a bold proclamation that essentially translates to: If you like Spider-Man, you’re going to love Daredevil!

They are unabashedly similar, and the Marvel bullpen doesn’t seem to care if you know it.

SOMETHING OLD…
Meet Matt Murdock, a studious fellow, much like Peter Parker. Murdock sticks to his studies to please his dad, while longing to play sports and be athletic. Parker, of course, sticks to his studies to please his beloved Uncle Ben, while longing to be dd1besorrypopular, like Flash Thompson.

When Parker is shunned by the cool kids at school, he sobs, “They’ll be sorry they ever laughed at me!” When the neighborhood toughies taunt Murdock for “turning all those heavy pages in your school books,” he fumes, “The day will come when no one will ever laugh at me again!”

After establishing outsider status, each young man has a run-in with radioactive biological technology, which imbues them with supernatural powers. Here, Parker’s infamous spider bite is tweaked into a tale of teenaged Matt Murdock heroically saving a blind man, only to be struck by a radioactive canister. The accident blinds him (can you say “irony”?), but no matter! Now that he’s had a brush with radioactivity, he can do everything better, because all his other senses are heightened to superhuman levels.

Are you thinking, as I am, “My spider sense is tingling”?

In each story, the father figure is murdered by common thugs, inspiring the grieving young man to develop a costumed vigilante identity. And they do so with style, each sewing a nifty costume in which he will be free to bash heads, comically quipping with every swing, kick and blow.

The common thugs Daredevil first fights are a bunch of no-good-niks that have dealt him a personal blow. Matt’s father, aging boxer Battling Murdock, can no longer get honest fights, so he signs a contract with “The Fixer,” in order to finance his brilliant son’s college education. This seems to work well for a while, but when Battling Murdock faces Dynamite Davis, in a prideful attempt to impress his son, he WINS the fight rather than taking a dive, as instructed. The Fixer retaliates by ordering his elimination.

Tragic, yes, but let me pause a moment to say: I’m a bit confused. Previous to this fight, “middle-aged sensation” Battling Murdock had been unstoppable in the ring, dd1fixerdeclaring “I can’t believe it, FIXER! It all seems like some kinda miracle!” We understand the elder Murdock is nowhere as smart as his offspring, but can he really be so dense he doesn’t understand that having a manager named THE FIXER might have something to do with his success? And did he never realize that though winning against Dynamite Davis might earn him the respect of his son, double-crossing THE FIXER might not be the wisest career move?

Well, getting back on track with my “Something old, something new…” theme, I just thought I’d mention that The Fixer, with his jaunty hat, pin-striped suit and cigar, looks suspiciously similar to the thugs in every other Marvel comic.

dd1thugs

Look up the term “Crime Syndicate Boss” in the dictionary, and any one of these fellows is likely to be showing his ugly mug on the page. This is what bad guys are supposed to look like—when they’re not wearing tights and capes.

SOMETHING NEW…
So…a lot of old favorite themes going on here…but what’s new? How about a new artist? Bill Everett gives us our first glimpse of Daredevil, in his vibrant yellow, red and black costume. Everett came in as a “guest artist” for this first issue, co-creating Daredevil (with Stan Lee, and to some degree, Jack Kirby). Back in the 1930’s, Bill Everett created Sub-Mariner for Timely Comics, which later morphed into Marvel Comics. A couple of years after co-creating Daredevil, he’ll return home to Marvel Comics, serving as a principal artist for Hulk and Doctor Strange.

dd1redNow, here’s something else new: red hair! Of course, carrot-tops are no strangers to the Marvel Universe, but I haven’t yet seen a character with hair as RED as Matt Murdock’s. Flash Thompson is working that creamsicle vibe, and Pepper Potts occasionally sports a most alarming shade of strawberry blonde, but Murdock’s hair is red-red, so red, it practically jumps off the page. If not for his super-acute senses, snazzy costume and fearless attitude, we might say that RED hair is his most defining characteristic.

SOMETHING BORROWED…
However, Murdock does have acute senses, and I’m going to use that to continue my theme of “Something old, something new, something borrowed…” Yeah, I’m stretching here a bit, because Marvel Comics is borrowing from itself, so really this is something old, but work with me here.

The Marvel superhero doesn’t always spring from a glowing resumé of pleasant experiences and advantages. Sometimes, the strongest people are those who have the most to overcome. As we’ve already seen, the very talented X-Men use their strange assortment of mutations to do much good in the world. These mutations might be considered handicaps (Beast’s appearance, Angel’s wings, Scott’s eyes). Even their leader, Professor X, is confined to a wheelchair, yet this in no way impedes his ability to use the great power of his mind.

dd1radarIn the Fantastic Four, it sort of works backwards. Ben Grimm is a handsome, strapping fellow, yet as Thing, his grotesque appearance might be considered a handicap (how in the world does he hold a knife and fork?). However, it’s through this “handicap” that he experiences tremendous physical strength.

Murdock does not have a “mutation” that is like a disability; neither does he have a superpower which impedes his ability to function in his normal life. No, he has an actual disability. It’s reported that in general, blind people find their other senses heightened, but thanks to a hefty dose of radiation, Murdock’s disability becomes his greatest asset. He develops a strange “tingling sensation” that acts as a sense of radar. (Again, “tingle” unapologetically draws a direct correlation to Parker’s “spider-sense.”) He can hear a heartbeat, recognize any smell, taste exactly how many grains of salt are on a pretzel. And forget Braille! Murdock’s sense of touch is so acute, he can read the newspaper simply by feeling the impression of the ink!

However cool and advantageous all of this might be, Murdock decides he also needs a weapon for fighting crime. So he creates one from his unassuming cane. Like the lame Dr. Don Blake, this “poor handicapped guy’s” accessory magically assists in transforming a disability into a great source of power.

With only a yellow and black costume, a weaponized cane and his radioactively-enhanced senses, Daredevil takes out the Fixer’s thugs. When the Fixer escapes, Daredevil follows the scent of his cigar smoke and tackles him in the subway. The Fixer dies of a heart attack, but Daredevil tricks his flunky into making a confession in front of two police officers. Our noble hero does not kill the bad guy, but since the bad guy’s usefulness has come to an end, the writer finds a way to conveniently dispose of him.

And here’s where we depart from the Spider-Man way. Peter Parker feels responsible for Uncle Ben’s death, and out of guilt, continues his crime-fighting crusade. Matt Murdock, on the other hand, gets closure regarding his father’s death, right here in the first story. As he continues his superhero exploits, it will no doubt be for very different reasons than young Parker.

DISASSOCIATED PERSONALITY DISORDER
However, as much as it seems Matt Murdock is an all-around good guy, extremely well-adjusted in the face of everything that’s happened to him, there’s something unnerving about some of his thought processes. To weasel his way around the promise he made to his dad to never “resort to force,” and “become a fighter,” he sews a yellow and black costume and decides that whenever he’s in costume, he will no longer be Matt Murdock, so he’ll be free to bash in heads left and right.

dd1burst

Villains are famous for referring to themselves in the third person. It happens so often, it’s almost comical. Sometimes you have to wonder if they do this to disassociate themselves from their evil deeds. “Oh! It’s not ME who’s planning to blow up New York City in a quest for world domination! It’s the wily, crafty Dr. NoGood!”

Daredevil doesn’t do this verbally, but Murdock does it psychologically. He seems to want to have it both ways, and has devised an elaborate fantasy so he can remain the good son to his dearly departed dad, while at the same time avenging his death. Well, he IS a smart guy, and a lawyer, so I guess he knows how to manipulate facts and circumstances to get the most desirable outcome. I’m curious to see, though, if in future issues he puffs out his chest and announces, “And now Daredevil will deal with your treachery!”

Tune in next week, folks…

fondaOkay, where was I? Something borrowed? I’ve got one more. How about the name Hank? The driver of the truck that hits young Murdock is named Hank. I have never in real life met as many people named Hank as I have in a few short years of reading Marvel Comics. Do you think this truck driver is a moonlighting Hank McCoy or Hank Pym? Stan sure did love the name. Was it really that popular in the 1960’s? Or maybe Stan was a big fan of…Henry Fonda?

SOMETHING BLUE
And now at last I come to “Something blue”!

dd1karenIn the earliest Spider-Man stories, Peter Parker doesn’t have a buddy, but Matt Murdock opens a law firm with old college pal “Foggy” Nelson. They hire pretty young secretary Karen Page, who clearly catches Foggy’s eye. She, in turn, takes an instant liking to Matt—though it’s really more of a mothering thing, as she confesses to Foggy that she feels Matt “seems to need someone to look after him!”

Like Jane Foster and Pepper Potts, Karen has a not-so-secret crush on her boss, never suspecting he’s secretly a superhero. And, like Pepper, Karen will have to endure the unwanted attention of the boss’ second string cohort, who lusts after her, even as she envisions herself with the star player.

Pepper’s unwanted suitor is ironically named “Happy,” but Karen’s attention comes from “Foggy.” I’m giving Foggy another nickname: Blue. Because I’m predicting it’s going to be just too sad for him that he’ll never get together with the girl of his dreams.

Also: I suspect Matt Murdock will keep Karen at arm’s length, citing his devotion to crime-fighting as a top priority that leaves him little time for romance. That, or he’ll obsessively worry that anyone he lets too close to him will inevitably be put in danger’s path. Either way, our vigilante hero will lead a lonely life. So, perhaps for all the vibrant yellow, red and black of his costume, Daredevil is also blue.

Sigh…

You know…It’s tough being a superhero. Welcome to the club, Daredevil! The charter members can tell you what you’re in for: In your secret identity, you’ll constantly risk your life and what do you get in return? Nothing! You’re just glad if you don’t see a nasty headline about yourself in the Daily Bugle, or your trusted employees aren’t making snide remarks behind your back about missing the Employee Banquet. Sometimes your costume will bunch up under your street clothes, and other times you may have to decide between taking your Biology exam, filing a legal brief, and stopping a gang of bank robbers. dd1beginThe weight of so many lives is balanced in the wielding of your weaponized cane, unearthly hammer, or supply of rubber cement. And when you get a tear in your costume, who’s got to take needle and thread and darn the darn thing?

Yep. It’s tough being a superhero.

But…we already knew that.

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Posted in Daredevil | 2 Comments

Meanwhile…: March, 1964

AMAZING SPIDER-MAN #10

asm10“The Enforcers!”
Script: Stan Lee
Art: Steve Ditko
Letters: Sam Rosen

IN A NUTSHELL
When the city is terrorized by the Big Man and the Enforcers, Spider-Man springs into action. Betty Brant is threatened by the Enforcers, but refuses to tell Peter why. Peter spreads the word that he knows the Big Man’s secret identity, with the intended outcome that he is hauled in by the criminals. As Spidey, he fights the Enforcers, but the Big Man gets away. Despite Peter’s suspicions that J. Jonah Jameson is the Big Man, the villain is revealed to be a lowly newspaper columnist. Peter still does not understand what’s going on with Betty.

WHAT’S HOT
ADJECTIVES. This month, Marvel begins the grand tradition of qualifying the creators’ names with colorful adjectives. Here, “Smiling Stan Lee, Swinging Steve Ditko & Sparkling Sam Rosen” provide the latest and greatest stupendous episode of Spider-Man. And so the fun begins!

PALS? Flash tries to warn Peter to be careful around the Enforcers, and Peter suspects he’s “really got a heart somewhere under that thick skin!” Do I sense a bro-mance brewing?

TEAMWORK. When Spider-Man gives the “spider signal,” the police take it seriously. It’s good to know that where it most counts, Jameson’s character assassination of Spider-Man is falling on deaf ears. Also, it’s noted in this issue that there are “countless examples of brilliant police work.” At last!

SPUNK. I love it when Spidey is lassoed by the Enforcers and delivered to the Big Man and says, basically, “Oh, good! Now that I’ve got you all together…” with no concern that he’s been brought there against his will. He’s the poster child for Eternal Optimism.

LEFTOVERS. Spidey constructs a giant spider dummy from “leftover webbing.” How much of this stuff can he hide up his sleeves?

WHAT’S NOT
HYPERBOLE. I’ve recently finished my Awards for 1961-1963, but I have to remember this Author’s Boast for next year’s awards: “We feel it only fair to warn you…once you have savored the thrills and surprises which only SPIDER-MAN can provide…you may find it difficult to ever again be satisfied by lesser magazines!” Oh, and in case that wasn’t enough, immediately after: “With this classic tale, the Marvel Age of comics reaches a NEW PLATEAU OF GREATNESS!!” However, the Big Man and his gang are just a bunch of thugs with no real superpowers. Having a hard time reconciling this with “the new plateau of greatness!!”

PROMISES, PROMISES… The cover also promises us that we will learn why Jameson really hates Spider-Man. I eagerly looked forward to this revelation, but ended up disappointed. Jameson sits in an office dreaming up ways to make money, cheat his employees and deceive the public. Anyone smart enough to rise to his level of power knows that even the most obscure superhero has more integrity than he does. I already assume Jameson considers himself inferior, in comparison with Spider-Man. What I want to know is WHY? What drives him? And can he change?

DOUBLE STANDARD? After Peter gives blood, the doctor advises him to “take it easy for a few days.” However, immediately after her mysterious operation, Aunt May leaves the hospital and goes gallivanting on a trip to Florida! Huh?? Well, wait! Maybe there’s a good explanation…

WHAT IF… when Aunt May got a transfusion of Peter’s spider-enhanced blood, she was instilled with superpowers and became…Spider-Aunt? That would be cool! No?

THE SECRET IS SUPREME. Peter could turn into Spider-Man and take care of business but he defers, not wanting to reveal his secret identity. It makes for good drama, but sometimes I wonder if these secretive superheroes need to get their priorities straight. When somebody gets killed due to their insistence upon secrecy, I wonder which incarnation they’ll use to attend the funeral.

THE SECRET…IS A DUD. When all is said and done, turns out Jameson is not the Big Man–no, it’s weasly little columnist, Frederick Foswell. Who is found out and carted off to jail. A nice job is done in building up suspicion that Jameson may be the tall guy in the strange mask. The Big Man may not be the greatest super-villain ever, but with his odd looks and command of the crime syndicate, Marvel could get more mpg’s out of him by letting the mystery linger, at least for another few issues.

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STRANGE TALES #118

st118“The Man Who Became the Torch!”
Script: Stan Lee
Art: Dick Ayers
Letters: Sam Rosen

IN A NUTSHELL
The wizard breaks out of prison, disguises himself as Torch, and kidnaps both the real Torch, and sister Sue. Now he is free to perfect his anti-gravity device! Held captive within a giant billboard advertisement high above the streets of NYC, Torch finagles a way to give the fiery “4” signal, bringing Reed and Thing to the rescue. Torch faces off against the Wizard, who escapes by turning up his anti-gravity device full throttle. But it gets stuck, and the Wizard floats off into the upper atmosphere…never to be heard from again?

WHAT’S HOT
WEASEL WORD. When the Wizard dons his Torch disguise, he brags that he can now imitate almost anything the real Torch can do. I’ve read enough weasel words in Marvel comics to know when a door is being left open.

st118evilst118goodART. Nice job how the real Johnny looks so handsome but the fake Johnny looks maniacal.

HERO BOAST. “My near-nova flame can melt anything…except a chick’s cold heart!” How bold! And yet so sad…

SCIENCE. A device that completely nullifies gravity could end up being extremely useful in the Marvel Universe. Of course…

WHAT’S NOT
SCIENCE. In the wrong hands, a device that completely nullifies gravity can be absolutely terrifying! Not to worry, though. The Wizard had this device in his hands, and where is he now? Somewhere beyond the atmosphere…

QUESTIONABLE READING MATERIAL. The prison library has books about the art of disguise? Is this really the best way to stock a prison library? Where is this volume shelved? Midway between The Alchemist’s Guide to Better Bomb Building and Safe-Cracking for Dummies?

DISGUISE. To escape prison, the Wizard covers his beard with melted crayons. Yuck. Why not just shave?

VILLAIN BOAST. “How easy this is for a man of my genius!” Yes, the Wizard actually says this. Of course, this comes from a man who would rather smear melted crayons over his face than shave, so I question his “genius.”

POWER. “And power! Undreamed-of power! Supreme power!” Hey! Do you think the Wizard wants to be powerful?

“LI’L.” Johnny calls his buddies “Li’l friends.” Unless you’re Abner, or a pint-sized toddler in a tiara, nobody likes to be called “Li’l.” Least of all, teenage boys.

CAPTAIN KANGAROO. Johnny dreams of being “the Captain Kangaroo of the teenage set!” I’m not even sure what this means, but it’s a disturbing image…

PUSHY EDITOR. Usually, an editor’s note appears in a caption at the top or the bottom of a panel. But here, the editor reminds us of Torch’s last encounter with the Wizard right in the middle of the Wizard’s word balloon. I’m tellin’ ya! These villains, they don’t get no respect!

TOO GOOD TO BE TRUE. Shouldn’t Johnny have figured out that when something arrives in the mail that seems to be too good to be true, it probably is? Has he learned nothing from the Fantastic Four’s last run-in with Mole Man?

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st118thumb“The Possessed!”
Script: Stan Lee
Art: Steve Ditko
Letters: Sam Rosen

IN A NUTSHELL
Testing their ability to control humans, creatures from another dimension possess Bavarian villagers. Strange engages in a staring contest with the chief invader, breaking the spell and sending the aliens back to their own dimension.

WHAT’S HOT
LANGUAGE. In the credits, the creators of this story describe themselves as “Magical…mystical…mysterious.” Inside, we are treated to adjectives like bewitched, ethereal, shadowy, supernatural. When “A voice which is not quite a voice” issues a strange command, I’m thinking… this sounds more like poetry than comic books! Yet, even creatures from a distant dimension choose to express derision with the ever-popular “Bah!”

THE WORLD’S END. Recently saw the sci-fi comedy The World’s End, and find startling similarities. Well, except for the Brits on a quest to get completely sloshed. But both have beings from another dimension, possessed townspeople, a wise old-timer, and a conquering hero. Strange’s staring contest, ending with the alien exclaiming “No more! I can bear no more!” could easily be compared to the climactic scene in The World’s End. (WARNING: Spoilers at the link AND NSFW!)

WHAT’S NOT
LANGUAGE. On the cover, the Doctor Strange story is called simply “The Possessed,” but on the splash, this is expanded to “Dr. Strange Dares to Probe the Uncanny Secret of…the Possessed!” Kind of a long title for an eight page story. But it does make nice use of another one of those Doctor Strange-type adjectives…uncanny

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FANTASTIC FOUR #24

ff24“The Infant Terrible!”
Script: Stan Lee
Pencils: Jack Kirby
Inks: George Bell
Letters: Sam Rosen

New York City is visited by an alien whose behavior is so strange, Reed deduces it is merely a child. Thugs who apprehend and manipulate the child alien to steal an armored truck soon discover the infant terrible doesn’t share their worldly values; he turns cash into pigs, diamonds into bird eggs. Frustrated by the humans, the alien lashes out, capturing Thing, Torch and Invisible Girl in an impenetrable bubble. But Mr. Fantastic stays behind to contact the parents, who arrive in the nick of time, and take the child home.

IMAGINATION
This tale is a real exercise in literary fancy, envisioning how an immature child with a lot of power but no sense of right and wrong might wreak havoc on the earth. Giant soldiers, ice cream sodas and ships in a bottle–what kind of wacky stuff is going on here? On the splash, we’re informed that “This yarn breaks all the rules!” and while I don’t see an unparalleled degree of creativity, it certainly stretches the imagination. Bravo for concept!

SCIENCE, PART I
Reed not only deduces that the creature is an infant, but also that it is an alien from outer space. What if it had been from a civilization deep in the center of the earth? Or from an alternate time or dimension? But then, I guess it didn’t take too much brainpower to figure this one out: the creature is, after all, GREEN.

SCIENCE, PART II
Reed is “the master of science,” but doesn’t seem bothered by the fact that radio beams would take decades or centuries to travel into outer space. He’s counting on his message hitting its intended target before day’s end. Of course, Reed’s radio beams are ultra sonic, which sounds like the equivalent of “super-duper” radio beams. However “ultra sonic” is probably best translated as “VERY LOUD,” so maybe those alien parents HEARD his message rather that by picking it up on their transistor radio. I don’t know. Comic book physics are a little beyond me….

In addition, to make this work, we need to allow for a few more assumptions: 1) that the alien parents are already in the neighborhood, looking for their lost child, when they pick up Reed’s message, and 2) that they can travel faster than the speed of light, in order to reach earth in less than one day.

Oh, yes! One more thing. Reed’s message must have contained a photograph of the alien child. Either that, or the parents speak English as a second language.

PHILOSOPHY
Reed finishes by saying “I’ve always thought that evil and ignorance go hand in hand.” Sure, it’s another one of those heavy-handed smarty-pants moments from Reed Richards, but at least he tempers it with “I gambled it would be so.” So Mr. Smarty-Pants admits that even though he feels certain that evil and ignorance go hand in hand, you can’t always depend on it. Good thing his gamble paid off and these aliens happen to be the friendly kind!

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TALES OF SUSPENSE #51

tos51“The Sinister Scarecrow!”
Script: Stan Lee
Art: Don Heck
Letters: Art Simek

IN A NUTSHELL
Circus contortionist the Uncanny Umberto disguises himself as the Scarecrow, and breaks into Tony Stark’s apartment to steals top secret plans. Extorting money from Stark, he escapes to Cuba with the suitcase of cash and the stolen plans. Iron Man tracks him down on a Cuban gunboat, which he sinks, along with the military servants of “the bearded one.” The scarecrow gets away.

In other news, Pepper sabotages Tony’s date with hot Veronica Vogue. Rather than scrap Broadway tickets, Tony suggests…Pepper and Happy attend together!

WHAT’S HOT
WHAT’S IN A NAME? It’s not enough to be “The Uncanny Umberto,” this guy also takes on the moniker “The Scarecrow”? What do you imagine his real name is? Jim Smith? (With sincerest apologies to any Jim Smiths out there…)

PUNCHLINE. Only recently, in the last half-dozen issues, have we seen Creator Qualifiers like “Marvelously Written by Stan Lee” and “Tenderly Drawn by Jack Kirby,” but I believe this is the first time we see the letterer being the punchline of the joke.

HAPPY PAL. Happy proves himself a true friend to Tony, willing to go after a costumed intruder, not once, but twice.

WHAT’S NOT
CROWS. Okay, I know it’s supposed to be cool that the Scarecrow has trained birds to help with his criminal mischief, but for me, these are entirely too reminiscent of the little animals that so readily assist Disney’s Cinderella.

EVEREADY? The Scarecrow gets away because Iron Man’s transistors are almost drained of power. I’m starting to sense that Iron Man’s battery life will be entirely dependent upon the needs of the plotline (sort of like the fluctuating lifespan capabilities of Torch’s flame).

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tos51thumb“The Primitive!”
Script: Stan Lee
Plot & Art: Larry Lieber
Inks: George Bell
Letters: Sam Rosen

In the second story, Tales of the Watcher, we find ourselves in the 21st century, where one brother sells used “aero-cars” while the other searches for intelligent life in outer space. I don’t know which I find more incredible–the blatant anti-war message that human civilization peaks with the invention of a bomb that makes war “too horrible even to think of,” or the fact that by this time we should all be driving around in “areo-cars.”


X-MEN #4

ux4“The Brotherhood of Evil Mutants!”
Script: Stan Lee
Pencils: Jack Kirby
Inks: Paul Reinman
Letters: Art Simek

IN A NUTSHELL
While Mastermind and Toad quarrel with Scarlet Witch and her brother Quicksilver, Magneto takes control of a freight ship, which is then used to capture a small South American town. The X-Men travel to Santo Marco and attack Magneto and his team. Professor X is injured in a blast, no longer able to read minds. Magneto sets up an atomic bomb, but Quicksilver disagrees with his plan to blow up the entire nation, and disarms the bomb just before the evil mutants escape.

WHAT’S HOT
NOT SO EVIL. Magneto saved the Scarlet Witch from an angry mob, and now she feels she owes him something. Quicksilver stays with Magneto, only because he is loyal to his sister. Though both are “evil” mutants, they operate from noble sentiments, not always on board with Magneto’s tyrannical plans. I sense that Quicksilver’s disarming of the nuclear bomb is only the beginning of dissension in the ranks.

HANK. Beast is Hank McCoy, and Giant-Man is Hank Pym. Was Hank really such a popular name in the 60’s that TWO Marvel superheroes have this same name?

WHAT’S NOT
PRACTICE. I’ve only read a few of these X-Men stories so far, but it seems they always begin with a practice session in the Danger Room, where each X-Man gets to show off his powers. I know this helps to develop their personalities, and show their skills, and perhaps the comic-reading boys of the 1960’s liked this kind of thing, but I’m finding it a bit tiresome. Let’s get on with the story already!

GLUTTONY. Look at the size of that ice cream soda Bobby is sipping away at on the bottom of page 9! Is there any particular reason why he needs to overindulge to that extent? Wouldn’t “self-control” be a defining characteristic of a noble X-Man? Or, are we simply showing here that Bobby is a growing teenage boy with a bottomless pit of a stomach?

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TALES TO ASTONISH #53

tta53“Trapped By the Porcupine!”
Script: Stan Lee
Art: Dick Ayers
Letters: Sam Rosen

IN A NUTSHELL
The Porcupine causes Giant-Man to break his ankle. While Giant-Man recuperates, Porcupine infiltrates his fan club. When the club visits their hero, dressed as villains, Porcupine emits a powerful sleeping gas. Though he can’t capture Giant-Man, he takes Wasp prisoner. She escapes, unaware that Porcupine is tracking her to Pym’s home. Porcupine and Giant-Man fight, and the villain hopes to steal Giant-Man’s growth capsules, but mistakenly takes an overdose of shrinking capsules, reducing himself to the size of a microbe.

WHAT’S HOT
GOOD GUYS. Whenever Marvel wants to show their heroes in a philanthropic light, it’s a sure bet they’ll be entertaining orphans.

CONCERN. “In a paroxysm of white hot fury,” Giant-Man vows to find his little partner. Though Hank’s always been reluctant to voice his feelings to Jan directly, it’s obvious he secretly cares very much about her. In this story, it’s nice to hear him finally speak his heart, even though it is in a moment of emotional stress that he’ll probably try to explain away later. But Jan knows how he really feels…and so do we.

WHAT’S NOT
UNADVISABLE. Okay…a club where fans dress up as villains…perhaps not really such a good idea…

INSANITY. Porcupine thinks “a few days of solitude” will bring the Wasp “to the brink of madness.” What?? Wow…really? A few days of solitude is what I would call a retreat…a vacation.

CHEER. “Giant-Man! Giant-Man! Rah-Rah-Rah! Giant-Man! Giant-Man! Sis-Boom-Bah!” I’ll let that cheer speak for itself as to why it made its way on to my “Not Hot” list.

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tta53thumbThe Wonderful Wasp Tells a Tale
“When Wakes the Colossus!”
Plot: Stan Lee
Script & Pencils: Larry Lieber
Inks: Don Heck
Letters: Ray Holloway

IN A NUTSHELL
Evil warlord Mingo keeps his superstitious subjects in line by threatening that if they disobey, an oversized statue will come to life and kill them. When the people have had enough of Mingo’s tyranny, the statue does come to life–but it leaves the people alone and destroys Mingo’s palace.

WHAT’S HOT
HONESTY. The evil Mingo gloats, “Never has an oppressor been so safe from those whom he tyrannizes!” No points for being an oppressive tyrant, but you’ve got to admire his transparent honesty.

BEAUTY. Wasp pretties herself up for her community service work with “those handsome ex-G.I.’s.” She’s a little bit patriotic…and a little bit vain. Hmmmm…maybe more than a little bit vain. But then, if I were as pretty as the Wasp, I’d also be vain!

tta53bugeyeWHAT’S NOT
BUG-EYED. All the humanoids in this “alien world far out in space” (except for Mingo, who looks vaguely Asian) have really large, oddly-shaped eyes.

LIES. The moral of this story is: Mortals may be evil, but supernatural entities are not! Huh? Since when? Sure, the ex-G.I.’s will more than understand the “evil mortals” aspect, but what’s all this hooey about supernatural entities being nothing but goody-goody? I’ve seen enough movies and read enough comic books to know that that’s not always the case. I’m not buying it. Are the ex-G.I.’s likely to buy it? Or, perhaps their minds will be so clouded by Wasp’s beauty, they’ll believe anything she says!

THE REAL STORY
The real story here is not within Wasp’s tale, but in the way she tells it. It’s not about good and evil, it’s about men and women. Jan asks Hank if he’d like to hear her story, and he replies, “I know better than to try and stop you, kid!” So, we get the impression he doesn’t really want to hear the story, but then he says “Shoot!” And I don’t think he meant, “Shoot! Now I’ve got to listen to her stupid story.” It sounds more like, “Sure! Go ahead!”

But then, when she’s done, Jan discovers Hank hasn’t listened to a word she said! Jan gets mad, and Hank is baffled, scratching his head. The whole thing is played for laughs, but is really dealing with a very serious issue.

Hank doesn’t take Jan as seriously as he should. Is he still thinking of her as a child? Or does his 1964 self now consider her “a gal”? Which means, in his mind, he now only has to take her a little more seriously than a child.

tta53womenOpen Letter to Hank: Hey, Hank! Who’s been at your side, through thick and thin? Who’s willing to follow you to the ends of the earth? And while you stay home and play with your test tubes, who’s doing community service with war veterans? Don’t underestimate the Wasp! You’ve got a good thing going, and if you don’t wise up, one day you’re likely to wake up and find your little Wasp has wrapped another superhero around her little finger and is walking down the aisle to become Mrs. Thor!

I know that’s not going to happen, but I firmly believe that if Janet Van Dyne got the idea into her head, she could make Blake/Thor forget the drab Jane Foster with a mere blink of her pretty eyelashes. Of course, if that happened, Pym could easily ensnare the impressionable Jane Foster by popping a growth pill and going into his Giant-Man routine (I doubt Jane would be much impressed by Ant-Man…).

So there! All’s fair in love and war. But I don’t think anybody would really be happy with any of these developments.


sgtf6
Posted in Doctor Strange, Fantastic Four, Giant-Man, Human Torch, Iron Man, Meanwhile, Sgt. Fury, Spider-Man, Strange Tales, Tales of Suspense, Tales to Astonish, Wasp, X-Men | 6 Comments